was this a rebound?

[confusius]

What do you guys think about this?

A girl breaks off with her previous relationship to be with somebody else. Is that new relationship a rebound relationship? When I met my ex she had a boyfriend (technically 2 boyfriends). Then she broke up with them to be with me. I have been thinking that I was probably a rebound for her without me even knowing LOL.

[DarkHelmet82]

you know my situation.. and it is similar... I do not think just because you were a rebound means that is the reason it didnt work. At least in my situation i do not think my ex was using me as a rebound, at least not purposly. She told me that she rushed into the relationship with me too fast. Which in English (not female lingo) is she isnt over her previous relationship and needs time. Sometimes people just rush into new relationships because they are lonely, or want to forget about their exes. Because she did have feelings for me, i dont consider it a rebound. She wasnt dating me JUST to get over her ex. She was dating me because she LIKED me. Im sure that is why your ex dated you. That is technically a rebound, but it doesnt mean that once they figure things out it wont work. It also doesnt mean that you were being used. She could have liked you but just wasnt ready for a relationship so soon, or started falling for you and that brought back all her memories of her ex.. I think thats what happened in my situation. People dont date people they dont like. At least in my experience. I am moving on, and if it works out cool.. if not thats cool too.You should do the same. Let me give you an example:

A Women is married lets say for 20 years. SOmething happens with her husband, maybe he dies, or they get divorced etc... A year later she meets a wonderful guy, and things are great. She starts falling for the new guy, but when that happens all the feelings of her husband.. whether they are good or bad start seeping in. She would then end it with the new guy, NOT because she didnt have feelings for them but because she wasnt ready for a new relationship. being happy with the new person makes her think of what she USED TO HAVE. Its like when people talk about their deasd partners, they cry for years, until they finally are able to accept it... some people deal with these things quicker than other, some take a longer time. In my exmaple it was a timing issue. Its actually a good thing.. who wants to be in a relationship with someone who isnt ready?

I firmly believe that not all relationships fail because of lack of feelings.. sometimes its a timing issue, sometimes its because people need to figure things out for themselves. People dont like a person one minute and then lose that feeling over night. There are usually other factors involved, and in a "rebound" they may end it because they arent over their previous relationship and need time to be single. This is why rebounds dont usually work because the rebonder isnt fully over theri ex.. but it doesnt mean that they dont want to be with you, just that they arent ready. Think of it this way, its a good thing that she dated you because you may have helped her move on, or at least aided in her recovery process. It may even work out if her feelings for you are true. It sucks, but it is what it is. Dont let anyone on here tell you different. I do also believe that if it is meant to be it will happen. If not then you will find someone better. I know In the end it will work out. I hope this helps you.

[Mathias]

Technically 2 boyfriends?

Seems bad.

[smackie9]

Sounds like she was a human trampoline lol!

[DarkHelmet82]

Sounds like she was a human trampoline lol!

not everyone is promiscuous....

[confusius]

That is technically a rebound, but it doesnt mean that once they figure things out it wont work. It also doesnt mean that you were being used. She could have liked you but just wasnt ready for a relationship so soon, or started falling for you and that brought back all her memories of her ex.. I think thats what happened in my situation. People dont date people they dont like. .

Thanks dark! I can see my previous relationship in a lot of things you said. I do think she liked me. And she believe that I came in her life for a good reason even if it didn't work. she thinks I came in her life to save her from the promiscuous path she was taking. That sounds good, but in the end I lost her. It didn't really help get her back. I do think she liked me, and loved me. Did she love me the same way I loved her? That's something because I do believe there wasn't anyway I was going to break up with her.

I don't think she really can handle been single because she seems to easily jump from one relationship to another. Well that's just what I think. She is addicted to attention.

[confusius]

Technically 2 boyfriends?

Seems bad.

Yes. She had a bf here in the US and another back in India where she was living at the time with her family. So in India she was going to be with one, and when she comes back in the US she was going to be with other guy. She broke off with them both pretty much at the same time.

[DarkHelmet82]

It MAY still work out dude.. but it probably wont.. just like with me.. it probably wont.. but I dont know what the future holds.. At least you know you were able to help someone when they were in need.. Your situation has nothing to do with you.. same with mine.. it has nothing to do with me. Sometimes people need time to figure things out.. the difference between your ex and mine is, my ex needs time to herself and needs to deal with it on her own. Your ex needs someone there to help her.. but again it doesnt mean she doesnt like/love you, and it doesnt mean she wont come around. Just move on and if it works out GREAT! It wouldnt be fair if you waited for her.

I know I am not going to wait for mine. If i am still single I may make one last attempt.. but that wont be for a month or so, and that is if I still want to be with her.

She may be the type to never settle down.. my ex ex was like that.. she just couldnt hold a steady relationship.... some people are like that