Someone please talk me down

[nathan joseph]

Get away now. Time will kill any crush you have. Out of sight, out of mind. I know too many people whove broken up for a fling that lasted a month or two....dont do it.

[IncognitoSir]

I'm sorry to inform you, but this is absolutely an emotional affair. He's hiding you from his gf, and I'm sure you've failed to mention to your bf that you see this guy outside of work and eat lunch with him on a daily basis. You're emotionally involving yourself with someone who's attracted to you other than your bf. Sinking deeper into what will surely destroy EVERYTHING you have built with your bf. This is how it starts. When are you going to stop doing these things while not knowing why you're doing them. You say you don't know what's going on so why are you in pursuit of this man? How hard would it be for you to end it with your bf or tell him that you crossed the line with another guy physically?????
I guarantee you, it's easier for you to walk away from this guy than to have a final conversation with your bf. And if you think you're doing no wrong here, imagine your bf in your shoes. Entertaining a woman who has a crush on him, hanging out after work with her, eating lunch with her.......and keeping it all from you knowing.

[Gratedwasabi]

I'm sorry to inform you, but this is absolutely an emotional affair. He's hiding you from his gf, and I'm sure you've failed to mention to your bf that you see this guy outside of work and eat lunch with him on a daily basis. You're emotionally involving yourself with someone who's attracted to you other than your bf. Sinking deeper into what will surely destroy EVERYTHING you have built with your bf. This is how it starts. When are you going to stop doing these things while not knowing why you're doing them. You say you don't know what's going on so why are you in pursuit of this man? How hard would it be for you to end it with your bf or tell him that you crossed the line with another guy physically?????
I guarantee you, it's easier for you to walk away from this guy than to have a final conversation with your bf. And if you think you're doing no wrong here, imagine your bf in your shoes. Entertaining a woman who has a crush on him, hanging out after work with her, eating lunch with her.......and keeping it all from you knowing.

This. You're cheating on your boyfriend. Sorry, you are. Not only that.. but you're cheating with a cheater. Way to move up in the world.

[KelE]

If one were to see my boyfriend they would regard him as emotionless. He is EXTREMELY apathetic and stoic. All of the pictures of us together he looks downright miserable, though myself and his family/friends know him well enough to know he is not. He tells me just because he doesn't show emotion doesn't mean he experiences it as much as anyone else. He is very emotional when we have sex, though, and I know he is very, very much physically attracted to me (he is pretty verbal about that).

I think it's more about your relationship and less about the staring guy at work. I hope you don't think you can, nor do you want to change your boyfriend's personality. That will be futile. You mentioned some other ways in your relationship that make it clear to you he really cares even though his personality is low key. Focus on those other things he does and be open to talk to him about how you need more of that. BUT don't try to change is personality traits. They are actually probably strong traits. Try to figure out if his way of showing you attention is enough for you.

[IndiReloaded]

If you don't want to fall for someone, don't stare at them. Attraction begins when stares are held for 4 or more seconds.

[MerryH]

Indi, I just stared at your post for like a good ten or more seconds.

Sup?



Kidding.

Anyway, this thread is pretty old. It was posted in February and the OP hasn't been here in months. Can these sorts of threads start being locked or whatever? Spammers love to bump old threads to the top and then people start posting great advice for the OP who likely won't read/respond to old threads. It's a waste. Mods? Is that doable? Please? Yes?

Thanks.

[doppelgaenger]

Indi, I just stared at your post for like a good ten or more seconds.

Sup?



Kidding.

Anyway, this thread is pretty old. It was posted in February and the OP hasn't been here in months. Can these sorts of threads start being locked or whatever? Spammers love to bump old threads to the top and then people start posting great advice for the OP who likely won't read/respond to old threads. It's a waste. Mods? Is that doable? Please? Yes?

Thanks.

Yes they can. In fact, this can be scripted as a live, automated process. Unfortunately, LA doesn't give much of a damn about anything these days. There's lots of fücked up stuff with this forum and he hardly ever logs in anymore. Mish practically fills in as admin these days.

[smackie9]

What you are going through is very common. You work together, you notice each other, you see each other everyday, socialize and bond....it's what everyone does at work. It's typical to develop feeling for them. But you don't have to act upon it.....it's called self control, learn how to use it.

[IndiReloaded]

Just report the post (like I just did): HEY PP--GET ON THIS WOULDA?

[IndiReloaded]

Indi, I just stared at your post for like a good ten or more seconds.

Sup?

Its true, there is some actual science to this. I'll have to find the paper (not now). You should know by now I'm a nerd.

[Petit Papillon]

People I tell you something. LA can't come recently,cause he has pretty much stuff going on in his RL . Misha is pretty busy too. Old threads...IT always was and always will be a problem... You have to be more carefull as to who you respond to Just keep on reporting spam and such things . Thanks LF society

[Petit Papillon]

Just report the post (like I just did): HEY PP--GET ON THIS WOULDA?

You reported it during my night time, there are 2 other mods working on your time zone schedule