Long distance and age difference

[Islandlady]

Hello everyone,

Ok so I kind of have this problem, I'm 25 and live in California. I went to a training in Colorado where I met a wonderful man that I can't seem to get out of my mind but there's onE problem he lives in Colorado. I've spent a week with him and speak to him often on the phone and through emails. He's 46 with two kids one 18 and the other 23. Age means nothing to me, he 's athletic has a gorgeous body a sweet smile and he's so active. I swear when is met him I thought he was no older then 33/35. We have an incredible connection and things in common. We seem to be on the same page with certain things, he makes my heart melt Anytime I think of him. I recently was able to spend another day with him. On this day he approaches me saying he can't stop thinking about me but needs to discuss the reality of things. We live thousands of miles away have not set up a plan to think future between me and him, and he feels as if he would be stopping me from experiencing a full life because of his age. I knowthis is not true due to the fact that he's outgoing and we share the same interests also wNt similar things for our future. he is an accomplished man has his own house, is passionate about his sons, and has a great job. This conversation was meant to stop this relAtionship from going any farther, that didnt happen he couldnt let me go. He knows im the woman he wants. I'm just starting out my career, but with my job there is room for a transfer if a position opens up. If a position opens up I'm really thinking of moving out to Colorado. Not only for him but because relocation is paid for me and the. Job would be also better. Any comments on this "future relationship " I'm hoping Nd dreaming of. Is this a "fAilure" in motion or just another true love story ?

[Cupids_arrows]

If you like him and he likes you then he will wait for you, don't throw a career away for nobody especially if you've worked hard for it and if he is a decent guy he will understand this. Just see how it goes and think about it, if you do move out there and the relationship fails can you transfer back? You don't want to be stuck out there on you own.

Good luck

[Islandlady]

Thank you, he has said he would wait, but of course we r both anxious to get our love story started. I wouldn't be able to transfer back right away, but I do find Colorado gorgeous anyways. Thank u once again.

[devonbrown]

If a possibility for a transfer opens up, then you could consider something more with this guy. But don't sacrifice your own life or career just for a chance to be with him.

Also, think about this, if you wind up marrying him, you will be a stepmother to two kids who are only a couple years younger than you. Can you handle that?

Good luck.

[violingirl]

Honey, he's old enough to be your father. Think about it in these terms...He's 71, you're 50. He's looking for a nice quiet nursing home and you're in the prime of your life, wanting to travel, etc. The age difference doesn't seem so bad now, but take a serious look at what your future is probably going to be like. Try to date guys your own age in your own town. Forget about him.

[smackie9]

A casual relationship would be OK, but the age difference WILL catch up to you. He is right, you need to not be tied down and need to experience life. He may desire you, what 46 year old wouldn't. The reality is, he isn't going to want to have kids for he's done all that. He's being realistic here. He knows he is looking for someone that is divorced, had their kids and is just looking forward to settling down with someone when they retire. Life for you will get very boring with an older guy like that. Give your head a few shakes and think realistically about what's going to happen 10 years from now....where do you truly want to be?

[Boisdevie]

It's a train crash waiting to happen. He's 21 years older than you. I'm a 47 year old guy and the idea of a relationship with somebody your age quite frankly strikes me as wierd. IT WILL NOT WORK

[vashti]

Two thoughts:

1) If he has much more than sex in common with you, I would be worried about his maturity level. You can expect to outgrow him emotionally within a couple of years.

2) He may look like he is in great shape to you, but he is at the age where things start to go wrong - things you can't even begin to imagine. Body parts wear out - that is the nature of being human, and once ONE thing wears out, the rest follow quickly.

[Islandlady]

I cant help but want him, so now how do i forget him = (

[Drumzzz]

go out
meet other people?
i know it's hard, i have to do the same at the moment

[Islandlady]

Very difficult , im fighting the urge to just text him and tell him how much i miss him = (

[Drumzzz]

i know the feeling
i like someone 6 years older than me (i'm 18)
and right now she is on holiday woth her BF
i won't see her for another 2 weeks
but maybe by then i'm partly over it

[Islandlady]

So ive been trying to find another man comparable to him and its definently not working = (

[Dank]

Patience is a virtue stay strong

[Islandlady]

Still missing him trying to move on, but i cant yet.