From the National Institute of Health ([url]http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001931/):[/url]
Borderline personality disorder is a condition in which people have long-term patterns of unstable or turbulent emotions, such as feelings about themselves and others.
These inner experiences often cause them to take impulsive actions and have chaotic relationships.
People with BPD are often uncertain about their identity. As a result, their interests and values may change rapidly.
People with BPD also tend to see things in terms of extremes, such as either all good or all bad. Their views of other people may change quickly. A person who is looked up to one day may be looked down on the next day. These suddenly shifting feelings often lead to intense and unstable relationships.
Other symptoms of BPD include:
Fear of being abandoned
Feelings of emptiness and boredom
Frequent displays of inappropriate anger
Impulsiveness with money, substance abuse, sexual relationships, binge eating, or shoplifting
Intolerance of being alone
Repeated crises and acts of self-injury, such as wrist cutting or overdosing
Here is what I would suggest - Don't worry about whether she has a personality disorder. Don't obsess over the reasons "why" the relationship ended. Simply accept that it ended and move forward with YOUR life. Concentrate on things that make you happy, expand your social circle, etc. Thinking about why will only make you crazy.
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