am I jealous or does she lack respect

[dru]

Hi,

I have been with my girlfriend for 4 months. We are in a very serious relationship. Before getting together, we both casually dated other people. I have stopped talking to any girls I was dating and have made it known I'm in a relationship.

My girlfriend is still talking and hanging out with many of the guys she was dating. She told me she is holding off on telling one guy that she is with me until she can see him in person, and he keeps trying to make plans to meet her. She actually went out partying with this guy right after we got together and did not tell me about it.

Tonight she was supposed to come hang out with me, and she told me one of the guys is coming to town with his friends and wants her to hang out. I know she already told this guy about me, and she claims they are just friends now (they never slept together), but I still feel like its a disrespect to me.

So am I being jealous, or does she lack respect?

Thanks in advance.

Dru

[HeartIsAching]

Is it not ok for you to go with her?

[dru]

I could if I wanted to.

[cologne]

Thats no jealousy;you have the right to feel the way you do.For me,i dont think that girl is serious with you.Something fishy is going on.I have been there before.

[Saya]

She may just like the attention, but Cologne might be right that she isn't probably serious with you.
But I don't think that's jealousy since I would feel uncomfortable if that happens to me.

[HeartIsAching]

I could if I wanted to.

Then it's just jealousy. If she has not problem with you going, then nothing's up.

[Superfantastich]

Before I started dating my boyfriend I was playing the field with a few blokes but soon as I started I stopped and told them all its a no go zone.
Yes I did it because it's the right thing but also quite frankly I had no desire to keep leading these guys on. Whats the big deal in saying "I have a boyfriend"?

[dru]

So as soon as I was done posting this, I hear my doorbell ring. She made the 30 minute drive over to my place without telling me. She told me she wanted to hang out with me instead.

I told her that I felt disrespected by the way she continues to lead on with some of these guys. It was the 2nd time we have had this conversation, and she told me she understood now. I told her that I trusted her not to cheat, but that it seemed like a bad idea or a need for attention to be going out drinking till the early morning hours with these guys without telling them about me.

For the record I never considered myself jealous. I don't care when she is out and she playfully flirts with other guys (I sometimes do the same with girls). I don't get mad when she talks to people, and I don't ask who she is hanging out with when she is out without me.

Thanks for the feedback guys.

[cologne]

Dont be denfensive of not being jealous.In this modern day world with so much craze for sex and sexual apps all over the place, one needs dig deep to know the other parner.For if only many married couples took time to know each other,there would have been less divorce cases today.You are doing the right thing bro,keep your ears down and eyes open but with maturity.