Brief rundown: This was my ex who left San Diego last year to move to NYC on a whim. We'd been together for a year when he suddenly decided a month out that he would be moving. We broke up last September when he left, and it was a long hard road to recovery after that. I went through hell for a while.
Anyway, my ex met someone and moved on, and so have I. It's still a sore spot obviously. One of the last times I spoke to him online he was drunk and spouting ridiculousness. He said things like he missed me and while it felt good, I knew it wasn't real. He spent enough time toying with my feelings while I was trying to get over him.
Got a little upset when he contacted me earlier today. I haven't been contacting him for months now as I've been busy with my own life, but every once in a while he contacts me out of the blue. He is going through a series of background checks right now for a federal job that he's been wait-listed for. He messaged me via Facebook to give me a heads up and we spoke cordially for 10 minutes or so before my boyfriend and I left for dinner.
In fact, I thought they'd already completed his background checks until he told me otherwise today. I kind of hope that they don't contact me because I really don't want anything more to do with him right now. He doesn't really have much of a choice in who his future employers contact though, or does he? I told my boyfriend about it and that it bothers me. He understood and reassured me that if it's just one more thing that I shouldn't worry about it and to just deal with it if the situation presented itself.
I'm still dealing with residual feelings of anger and hurt over my ex's leaving (among other BS he put me through). While he was never cruel, he was just a very careless boyfriend. And I keep feeling like there is always going to be one more hurdle to jump in my recovery. I really don't want this past hurt to hinder my current relationship. My BF is wonderful and supports me in every way. Any advice on how to get past this?