Questioning my realationship

[JimD]

Questioning my realationship
Hi all, looking for some advice on my realationship with my wife.
recently my wife has been coming home late from work, not by much anywhere from 30 to 45 mins,
this coming from a women who is usually very punctual, and other changes like she stopped calling me at her lunch time or when she does she rushes me off the phone she has even disconnected the call if i called her,
when i asked her about it she said it was just due to spending time with friends (co-workers)
but i guess i let my suspicious mind get the better of me and i did something i should not have, i checked her cell and sure enough there were text msgs to and from a male co-worker one of the msgs read that she didnt know what to do with the way she felt,
anyway to make a long story short, i confronted her, she was pissed that i looked in her cell but after a long talk she admitted that she had strong feelings for this guy but that i should not worry becouse she said she would never cross that line and has not,
he is just a very close friend accourding to her but im still very worried, should i be concerned and what would others do in this case.

[smackie9]

She has crossed that line....just because it hasn`t lead to sex doesn`t mean it`s not an affair. Text messages, lunches, meeting for drinks, long chats or flirting at work,etc is an emotional affair which is just as bad....she is emotionally leaving your relationship and your marriage is in dire trouble. She is in denial that this is an actual affair.....you need to point out to her that this behavior is no different than dating. When women do this, this means they are being romantically neglected, and getting special sexual attention for another man is very appealing....almost addicting. Open communication is needed. You need to talk to her, or maybe see a marriage counselor to sort through the issues.

[JfnL]

The fact that she was honest with you after you confronted he means there is still hope for you! What you need to do is exactly what smackie said and point out she is essentially dating this guy!

[pisces25]

And find out what you need to do to meet her needs in the relationship or what she feels is missing that compels her to feel strongly for someone else.

[Mathias]

The fact that she was honest with you after you confronted he means there is still hope for you! What you need to do is exactly what smackie said and point out she is essentially dating this guy!

There's no way to know if she was actually honest here.