Hi,
I'm a litle embarrassed to say some of this but I hope you understand. I dont mean to sound vain or like a dick but some stuff is on my mind so hoping someone can offer advice.
So I'm with my girlfriend around a year. Now she is very beautiful and I love her to bits. But a few things are bothering me. So some of it might sounds silly but its playing on my mind and its not like I want to stop seeing her but sometimes I wonder.
Ok so first thing...
Like I said, shes very beautiful, gorgeous face, lovely skin, gorgeous long hair and a body to die for. But, the dresses like a teenager a lot. Infact most of her clothes are just so old I think she has them since she was a teenager. She's started to make more effort when we go out and the times that she does, she's a knockout.
But often she just wears old clothes with very little style.
I work all day in a business in the city and the girls I see al day, well, I think they are often not as atractive as my girl but they wear such nice dressy clothes to work, after hours, lots of girls are wearing nice dresses and things out and about or to the pub or whereever but my girl just doesn't. It sounds aweful but I just find a nice sense of style very attractive, I'd never go after another girl or anything, I just find it bad that they draw my eye but my girl seems plain in comparision, which is silly because I'm thinking, "if my gf wore that skirt, I couldnt resist her", like that.
She got a new job after finishing her masters, not the same line of work as me but it's the usual, semi-formal type of place but she wears her studenty clothes and doesnt make much effort. I just think it doesnt make a good impression, I'm sure most of her co-workers dress appropriately.
Ok, so the 2nd thing...
Our sex life. It's good, sort of. I mean I love having sex with her but she doesn't really want to do much. I try to do nice and different things for her, and she seems to enjoy it but in the end she just wants me on top, the basic. I try to suggest other things but she just says no, that feels so good.
Besides that I think I do a lot just to "please her" in bed and make sure she's satisfied but is not very keen to reciprocate. Like this weekend, I was a little under the weather but we were in bed. She insisted I was on top but I was very tired. She came and I couldnt go much longer out of exhaustion. But she'll just lay there, the end, unless I run off to the bathroom to finish myself off which I'm not really gonna do.
She doesn't ever start things, she won't even kiss me much, just on the lips, she will hardly even touch me down there and I make sure I'm very hygenic and all that, she just doesnt seem to want to do it.
We have regular sex so its not bad in that way but sometimes it'd be nice if she took the lead a bit or tried to please me a little as I do for her rather than having to do all the work all the time. It gets a little frustrating. I like to be kissed and touched as much as she does.
Thirdly...
Protection. After a year we are still using comdoms, I'm not comfortable with that. I mean, I dont mind using them WITH another form of contraception. But after a year I don't feel good about it, comdoms alone are fine in the early months but once its more serious and people have sex regularly, I feel they are not enough, 99% effective is fine for a once off but for regular sex, well it only takes that 1%.
I've discussed it with her several times over the months and she's said she will be going to the doctors but nothing so far. Its getting frustrating and I'm very anxious about it.
Ok, so I'm sorry for sounding selfish and vain but she's a lovely girl and I dont want things going bad or simple issues but they are difficult to discuss and I dont know if there is anything I can do about it really, which makes life with her a little difficult.