So here's the short version of the story: met a great guy, things were going great and he even brought up marriage (not me!). He never formally proposed but we discussed it. When we met, he already had an MBA and was working as an investment banker but seeing my obsession with grad school made him want to go back to a top tier business school and get another MBA so he could climb up the corporate ladder faster. He was honest with me and told me that marriage wasn't his top priority anymore since he wanted to get business school out of the way. I agreed and we're both working on that. Here comes the bombshell......a few weeks ago, we got to talking about our relationship and he said he didn't feel he was emotionally ready for a relationship. Let me give you some background....he was engaged before he met me. However, they broke up and we met about three months after he broke up. That night, when he said he wasn't ready for a relationship, I asked him if he still thought about his ex and he paused and said yes. I was quite hurt and distraught that night and we left the conversation unfinished. The next day, he called me and acted as if nothing was wrong. I got annoyed and told him that I thought we'd pretty much broken up the previous night. He was genuinely shocked and told me that he didn't want to break up with at all.....he just isn't ready to emotionally commit. I got upset and told him not to BS me.....how can you talk about marriage and then a few months later say you're not ready for a relationship? I know he's not cheating because he works late (usually until 9pm) and he spends most evenings with me (either in person or on Skype). Also, his behavior hasn't changed at all since we went back to being 'friends'; in fact, he's become more caring and attentive and we have a lot of fun hanging out. I guess I'm just confused as to what all this means. Should I hang around and wait for him to become 'ready' or is this a lost cause? I assumed we would break up but he says I'm a very good friend and he doesn't want to lost me. Should I be patient and wait for him?
To be honest, this isn't the first time this has happened to me. The same thing basically happened in my previous relationship. Met a great guy, he brought up marriage quite quickly (which made me wary cuz marriage isn't something to rush into). Anyways, things were going great until he basically said the same thing.....he wasn't ready for a serious relationship. At that time, I was so hurt and angry that I broke up with him. I told him you can't keep a girl on cloud 9 and then suddenly throw her back down. I was young and maybe I didn't fully understand the situation but I broke up with him. I'll never forget the way he looked at me and said "Why are you doing this? I love you!" I told him no, if he loved me, he wouldn't be doing what he's doing. He kept trying to get back together for a long time but I refused. Sometimes I wonder if I let 'the one' get away. Afterall, he really tried hard to get back together but I didn't want to. However, if he really liked me, what was up with the whole 'let's go back to being just friends' thing?
I'm hesitant to do anything about the current situation. What if I try to break up with him and he does the same thing that my ex did? I need some advice please.....how should I handle the situation?