I'm 20 and I'm in my first ever relationship. We both attend Ohio Wesleyan and started dating in February. We spent all of our time together and were inseparable at college. But we live four hours away from each other. This worried me a little, because she has an undemanding part-time job, and she always talked about how often she goes out drinking with her girlfriends at home.
About a week into the summer, a guy made a move on her while she was very drunk and they hooked up for about 30 seconds before she pulled away. She told me what happened immediately and sounded very remorseful. I care about her so much that I probably forgave her a little bit too easily (I ignored her calls for a day). Soon after, I visited her, and as far as I could tell everything went great. But a few days later, she called me and sounded devastated. She said the night before I visited she got very drunk and made a move on a guy. They kissed for about a minute before she pulled away. She said that she considered not telling me because she didn't want to break up. She said that after my visit, she no longer had doubts, and that our relationship felt more right than ever before. I told her that I would call her the next day after I thought things over. I didn't want to break up with her, but to send a stronger message, I ignored her for the next several days. When I finally called her, I agreed to stay with her, but told her that she would have to curb her drinking.
Now, she drinks once or twice a week, as opposed to everyday. We have visited each other three times since then and our bond seems closer than ever but things are more up and down now. We have some amazing days together but we also have some arguments. She cries each time we say goodbye, we say we love each other, we talk about baby names, etc.
I am happy when I'm with her, but when we're apart I have become increasingly paranoid. I know firsthand that she has an incredibly busy social life, but whenever she doesn't pick up a call or says she is unable to talk I start to doubt her interest level. The most we've gone without talking during this period is probably only 24 hours, but I am (probably irrationally) constantly worried she's losing interest. I have become less productive at work and have trouble relaxing, even when I'm with my friends. I keep telling myself I just need to get to September when we'll be back at school but that is a month away.
I am wondering if I should break up with her for my personal sanity and mental health. Before we started dating, I had a lot of trouble with girls, and so that is one thing weighing on me. We have amazing chemistry and we both care about each other so much. I really want this relationship to work. If we broke up, we'd both be distraught. I've tried really hard to trust her more, but I don't know if I can. One problem is that my social life isn't very busy, so I have a lot of time to spend worrying. Part of me thinks I should break up but I feel like that could end up being a mistake.
Does anybody have any advice... please?