BF deleted me off Facebook

[Wakeup]

It doesn't change my mind on the subject of facecrap either... but this thread really wasn't about what you were arguing about .. na na nana na na.

*snorts*

[Saya]

Nothing will change until your bf changes his password on FB... if he doesn't change it then I'm sure that the hacker will still have an access to his account and continue to send spams etc to his friends.
So if you want to be on his FB then you should just tell him to change his password so that the hacker won't be accessing his account.
Or like someone here have said that, he could be hiding something from you.

[bvvt02]

I think I lost a couple of brain cells reading this post not gonna lie. Anyway...Kinks, I think you are making this a bigger deal than it should be. What I mean by that is 1) If there was a hacker that was harrasing you all he had to do was change his password and edit his privacy settings. Facebook has it to where you get sent a text notification when you log in from an unauthorized location...that being said I personally call b*******. 2) I would hope your thirty something year old boyfriend isn't immature enough to play games with you via facebook. And you as a 21 year old shouldn't either. Get to the point no need to say some guy is flriting with you! You have a right to know why this is happening. Stand up for yourself girl! What do you have to lose?!?! If he really gives a damn about you he'll shut it off or change his settings. 3) Trust your gut! It's the best lesson my ex cheater taught me. If you suspect he's doing something fishy because of another girl, 99% of the time it's true. Point is give up the facebook crap and get to the root of the problem. Communication is key.

And to those of you out there who are ANTI-facebook...at the end of the day to each his own. Some people use it to communicate with loved ones (as I do) because you live in different countries etc and some could just not give a damn. Dont be so close minded -- its merely an opinion.

[iamminzy]

dude i thnk he is lying to you because he can always make another account or he can always change his password and set his privacy... he's obviously trying to hide something from you... did you friends add him on facebook before? maybe you can ask them to view his profile or ask one of his friends lol...

[surfhb]

Just curious...are there any red flags in your relationship outside of this facebook issue? How often do you talk on the phone? Text?

Bingo! If you have a solid relationship away from the computer screen, who cares what goes on in FB.

This is the big question....forget FB. Any issues people make up based on how another acts on FB is simply not living entirely in the real world. Unfortunately this is exactly what FB is doing to us. Yeah...I get it.....its a tool to cheat. Your guy doesn't need to be on FB to cheat .

[jb1111983]

Somebody tell me this problem is over.
OP, you're his gf, not his daughter. You have the right to ask or tell him about things you're not happy with. Just because he's 32 and you 21 doesn't mean he decides everything in the relationship.

[kinks]

Just curious...are there any red flags in your relationship outside of this facebook issue? How often do you talk on the phone? Text?

Nope there aren't... We talk and text every night. We see each other 5 days a week (because we work together) outside of work though we only really get to see each other twice a week cos of our varying shifts. He doesn't actually use his fb very much at all and is generally very inactive on it, whereas I used mine much more (maybe that's a sign of our age differences, but I'm still at uni and studying so a lot of our social events is up on fb)

[kinks]

To be honest, everything that you have told us about this guy seems suspect; from ignoring you in front of colleagues at work, to this.

He is up to something l would guess.

That stuff at work is ok now... We spoke about it and he seemed a bit surprised by what I thought because he thought he was protecting me. Basically I have to keep him a secret from my family (as I'm not allowed to date at all) so he thought he was making it easier for me.

[Fairydust]

Sorry to agree with the majority here but this situation does reek of BS.
If you really want to know what your bf is like then creat a fake profile with some pics of a hot girl and send him a pm telling him he's sexy etc and see what he does...

[kinks]

You guys are gonna think I'm naive, but he's a decent guy, I don't think he's cheating because of how things are in real life... I just don't like not being his fb, it feels weird to me. His friends don't receive these PMs, it's only been me, his ex and him. He deleted his ex ages ago though like in january. And, as embarrassed as I am to say this, I've done the pics of the hot girl fake profile thing. I know it's immature. And he's not replied to them. He blocked and reported the profiles.

[Fairydust]

Just friend request him and if he moans about it tell him he is hurting your feelings....

Also...........who would go out of their way to hack someones account and find out who their gf and ex gf were (as u stated he never lists who he is in a relationship with this means they would have had to read all posts etc to find out) and message them...........seems like a lot of hassle to me. What exactly do the messages say?

[kinks]

Just friend request him and if he moans about it tell him he is hurting your feelings....

Also...........who would go out of their way to hack someones account and find out who their gf and ex gf were (as u stated he never lists who he is in a relationship with this means they would have had to read all posts etc to find out) and message them...........seems like a lot of hassle to me. What exactly do the messages say?

I think I will some time tonight... or once my exams are over on tuesday.
I don't know. It's so bizarre. The messages are really dirty and crude saying what this guy wants to do to me... and then my bf gets messages saying how this guy is sleeping with me. One of the messages I got was the hacker guy pretending to be my bf saying he'd lost my number and asking for my number.

[Wakeup]

Bingo! If you have a solid relationship away from the computer screen, who cares what goes on in FB.

This is the big question....forget FB. Any issues people make up based on how another acts on FB is simply not living entirely in the real world. Unfortunately this is exactly what FB is doing to us. Yeah...I get it.....its a tool to cheat. Your guy doesn't need to be on FB to cheat .

No he doesn't but it certainly gives him yet another opportunity and it definately will open up his options. Read her posting history ... She DOES NOT have a solid relationship away from the computer screen. In this case his facebook actions are yet another red flag that Op chooses to ignore but come her and share her angst once again.

Even if they had a solid relationship away from the computer... This particular action is a RED FLAG and men who cheat want woman to believe what you're trying sell in your post.

[kinks]

so what am i meant to do just add him again? that's all my problems sorted in one go...
On friday he told me i was the one for him... that doesn't sound like a guy about to cheat

[Wakeup]

Oh, FFS. OP will you please quit listening to his words and pay attention to his actions? Why didn't you take that opportunity when he told you that "You were the one for him" to tell him "well then, if that's the case, please add me back on your friends list."

Grow up and learn to communicate and quit being a naive little girl to this grown man or get out of this relationship. It sounds like he plays you like a fiddle.

Use your words with him when you know his words are not matching his actions. Quit being afraid.

*

Basically I have to keep him a secret from my family (as I'm not allowed to date at all)

Yea and Just how well do you think this is all going to end for you, Kink? Seriously!