my friend

[chris.28645]

Hi i have a friend me and her have been friends for almost 15yrs. We have been real close for the past 6 or 7 years now. I think i have been in love with her for that long. i have been chaseing her for that long also with very little to no results. she tells me at times she is think ing about it or likes me but dont want to loose me as a friend. now you would think i would let it drop at this point but i can cause i am so in love with her it is so hard to be around her without wanting to kiss touch her. when she has a man/bf it gets even worse cause i dont want to see her with somone else. we have messed around a little bit from time to time but i cant get her to actually date me. now recently she went back to a looser bf from her past so now im like there goes my shot again but really did i have a shot at all. ive went through this so long had my heart broken so many time and never seems to get easier. i cant quit talking to her cause she is such a good friend to me. so what can i do i try meeting people but im at a disadvantage were i am at hard to around here when i cant get out that much tried all the dating online things nothing when i do meet somone im never happy cause it aint her.

SO SOME ADVICE ON ANYTHING I CAN DO TO HELP WITH THIS THANKYOU VERY MUCH

[tomtom8p]

Well at this point I think there is 2 choices for you. You can choose to continue to persue her or you can choose to get over her so you can find somebody else. Unfortunately if you choose to get over her that would mean minimizing contact with her for a little while at least. You've been fixated on this one girl for so long because you've never given yourself a chance to heal. The thing about love is that you focus in on one person and you forget about everybody else. This is extremely unfortunate in your case because the girl you love doesn't love you back and she may never. You have been focusing on her so long that you don't relaize that there is somebody better for you out there. Everybody who is in love and breaks up is worried that the next person just won't be as good as the last. And of course when you go on dates your not happy because your still in love with another girl. You can't just expect to go on a date with somebody and instantly fall in love with them. It takes time to fall in love, believe it or not you weren't always in love with your friend.

If you let your feelings go of your friend then you will be able to move on and find true happiness with somebody who really wants you. The course of action that you should take now is to almost completely cut her out of your life, temporarily. Since you were friends before I think you can go back to being friends again but one thing is for sure you will never get over her if you continue to do the things the same. If you do it is quite possible that you will never find anybody because the only girl your interested in doesn't want you. On the other hand if you do cut her out of your life for a couple months to give yourself time to heal it will make her think. Right now you are letting her have her cake and eat it too at your own expense. Think about it, why would she risk loosing a friend for a relationship that might not work in the end. Things are comfortable for her now and she doesn't want them to change. But if she has already lost you as a friend and truly does have feelings for you then what would stop her from being with you?

I'm not telling you this so you can play games with her and try to win her over. If you decide you go no contact until your over her then it needs to be so that you can move on with your life. Nobody knows what the future holds. She may realize that she wants to be with you and she may not. However, if you don't make a change this situation will just stay the same. You will never get over her and she may never want to be with you.

Hope this helps