Advice on if he's interested or wants to be just friends. . .

[canndee]

Back story:
About a year ago I started seeing this guy. When we started seeing each other I wasn't looking for a relationship and was just getting over a bad break-up. But, of course, I'm a female and I started to get attached to this new guy. In the beginning he seemed interested (he called frequently, would arrange dates, shared personal information with me. . .) but we never solidified into a commited relationship. And I never brought up the topic because I was never threatened by the pressence of another. Until recently. . .
A couple of months ago I felt like he was pulling away. Calls and dates were becoming less frequent, he seemed to be engaging in new "facebook flirtations", and the kicker was that he went away for 4th of July weekend and not only didn't invite me but didn't even tell me about it. Obviously these are clear signs that he's "just not that into me". I took the hint and bailed. I sent him an email telling him that I'm "not built for 'friends with benefits' situations and that I shouldn't sleep with anyone until I'm in a relationship." He said he respected my decision and we didn't speak after that for a couple of weeks. Seems straight forward. But here's where I need some thoughts and opinions:
Two weeks after not speaking I was out near where he lives and asked if he wanted to meet up with me. He responded immediately and came out to see me. We didn't discuss the relationship and just hung out as normal (without anything intimate happening.) Not to mention he approached me with a "grand entrance" - playing an instrument, etc. He was trying to make in impression on me. . .
Then, a week later, I ask him to meet up again. He said "yes" but then "became busy". Clearly not a good sign and I decided I was completely going to let this go. He's clearly not into me. . .
But then I recently had a party that I had told him about in passing (but after being stood up decided I wasn't going to remind him.) Well, he remembered and came to the party. Not only did he come but he brought over "slushees" which he knows I like to mix with alcohol (something he clearly did for me because I'm the only person he knows who likes to do that.) He stayed until the very end and we kissed good-bye.
So. . .some honest feedback would be nice. I get that he's not ready for a relationship because I assume he would have brought that up once I said I didn't want to sleep with anyone I'm not committed to. But. . .is he contemplating it? Jumping to see me the first time, approaching me playing an instrument, and then bringing slushees to my party tell me there's a chance. But standing me up that other time throws me off and keeps me grounded that I might be getting my hopes up. Or is he looking to just be friends. . .?
I know I should talk to him about this but sometimes the feedback of others is helpful. Especially from the male perspective because I'd honestly like to know what guys think when they're in situations like this.

[smackie9]

Guys will do and say anything to get sex.....in his case back into getting sex. You want answers, you are going to have to ask him for yourself.

[Little delights]

What the guy said above ^. however that is not always the case. I'll give you a personal story of mine to help you understand the way guys think. I met this gorgeous girl. I swear it was love at first sight. We hung out all the time and did so man things within the first 3 weeks of hanging out. Slowly but surely I started to back away, it was because I was afraid of going into a relationship with her. I mean, she was perfect in every single way and now looking back at it, I should of done something. She kinda gave up on me because I distanced myself. You might ask yourself, how does this story relate to yours? Well, he could be experiencing the same thing. Sure every guy thinks about sex and so on, but your the one with all the power. Don't have sex with him till you are sure. Give him and chance and you will be surprised or you can just go on with your life and wonder, what couldof happened? I do every day and in a way regret the decision I made. Hang out with him and when the time feels right, ask him how he feels about you. Good luck!

Little delights

[surfhb]

Another thing to remember. Very few men will call, want to hang out, say nice things, ect because they just want to be friends with a girl. Its either theyre looking to get laid or want to date you....or both. Guys hang with guys. In fact, Id be wary of a man who likes to hang out with girls....unless hes very gay.

[Wakeup]

I'm thinking the amount of attention he gives you is dependent on his options (or lack thereof) at the time you invite him. Why don't you wait and see if he invites you to something, let him do some of the pursuing. If he never pursues then perhaps you should delegate him to the "experience pile" and move onto someone who actually pursues you while bringing your favourite drink mix?

Don't let him prime you for a friend with bennies dynamic. As someone else said, you hold the power when it comes to when you have sex. Don't have it with him if he's not wanting what you want, which is an actual full blown relationship.

[canndee]

Thanks guys!! I really appreciate your input!!