Friends with an Ex?

[Tetida]

I recently started hanging out with my ex. We broke up a year ago, and recently, because we have good mutual friends we sort of started hanging out with the same group again. I have no feelings for him anymore, but I am not so sure about him! Is it smart for me to be hanging out with them again... or should I stop. Those are some wonderful people and I would hate to stop hanging out with them just because of him.

[devonbrown]

Friendship can develop out of relationships, you just have to make sure that it is the same feeling both ways. You two were a big part of each other's lives, so it is not a big deal that you have some things in common.

If you think he may want more, just have a talk with him and let him know that you don't want this to be awkward for him. Let him know that you want to be friends, but you don't want him to have any issues with it. After that conversation, any problems he has are his and there is no need for you to worry.

Good luck.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

If they were his friends to start, leave them alone.

[jb1111983]

As far as I'm concerned, friends with an ex works only if both partners had mutually agreed to end the relationship or it wasn't serious at all. It doesn't work if one partner got dumped.

[Tetida]

Well after hanging out with them last night, I think it would be best if I stop. My ex, clearly isn't over me yet, he got sooo drunk last night, everyone was embarrassed. Devon, I want to sit down alone with him and have a talk, but he doesn't want that. BackUpOrGetStng, not all were his friends to start, some of them we met while we were together. And jb1111983, I was the one who got dumped!! Actually, we had a huge fight and we broke up. After that I tried to get back together, but he wouldn't hear of it. It was a serious relationship, we loved each other very much, we just couldn't get on common ground on certain things, unfortunately. It has been a year since we broke up, I got over him, and I thought he felt the same since he was the one who didn't want to get back together. I guess I was wrong.

[Andariel]

If he doesn't want to talk about it, then that is his problem.You did the right thing by offering to have a chat to clear things up. He did not accept your offer so no need to bother yourself with it anymore.

I think it would be best to avoid hanging out with him if he still has feelings for you but I don't think you should stop seeing your other friends because of him. You can still make plans to see them without him (ie. you could invite them to yours for dinner etc).

[reeba]

the breakup has to be definite and mutual.
also there is another problem. good luck finding a new boyfriend when you are hanging out with an ex. new boyfriends tend to be very untrusting when you hang out with a guy you use to sleep with. and for good reason too. first they know all about 'break up sex' and they know if your ex is a normal male he wouldnt mind some 'break up sex'