Originally Posted by
Fairydust
Right....there is a guy I work with that I have been flirting with, I get the impression he fancies me from his body language around me and little things he does with me that he doesn't do to every other girl at work (as far as I am aware). We had an extremely flirty conversation last week that turned slightly sexual in a jokey manner and the next time he saw me he was like "hellooooooo" in that really flirty way as he walked past. Anyway I have heard on the grape vine that he has a long term gf but I have never asked him outright if he is single and he has never informed me that he has a girlfriend. Our relationship is purely flirty rather than deep and meaningful conversations...
Anyway, I am off work for a couple of weeks now and am wondering if I should private message him on facebook with some flirty banter following on from the last conversation and see what he says....however as we are not friends on facebook and we work together I am wondering if this would be inappropriate?
Would you be happy to receive a random facebook pm from a girl you have seemingly been flirting with or would you think they were a bit odd...
I am very aware of the fact that I see him every day at work and am worried about making things weird if I have read the signals wrong...
You heard it through the grapevine that he has a girlfriend but instead of inquiring with him about that you want to ignore it like it doesn't exist and persue him anyway? Is that what you're saying?
He told one of my good friends that his relationship was "off again" a few weeks ago which is why I believe he is now single.
"Off again" are the key words that you need to pay attentiion to. This man is not finished with this girl. He is still very much attached to her if they have history of being on again and off again. You'd be wise to stay away from him unless and until he contacts you or makes some kind of move on you becuase he will likely take anything you offer him without committing and then dump you once he wants to be on again with this woman. You don't want to be a rebound and flirting with you is not a sign of anything when a guy is already attached. It could just be is normal demenour and personality.
You also don't want to be the pursuer here as I said.. he will take advantage of the fact that you are easily persuaded. I say that because you're considering chasing a guy just because he flirts with you. Be a little more discerning and make sure you're investing in someone who will give you back some kind of emotional return on your investment. He's no where near being ready for anything serious. You're not the type to just want casual sex. If you were you'd be doing what it takes to get screwed without worrying about asking advice from a board full of strangers as to what you should and shouldn't do.
Last edited by Wakeup; 12-09-11 at 04:22 AM.
“The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion