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Thread: Fight for no reason with my BF

  1. #1
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    Fight for no reason with my BF

    Hi all,
    Im Martina, recently i had a small fight with my boy friend for no reason. I tried to contact him through voice call and sms. But on hearing my voice he disconnects my call. i even send him sms that i still love him and let me know what mistake i committed. This is the first time he is behaving to me in such manner. Its quite strange to me. Does it mean we dont have proper understanding. what should i do? He is into me so much. its very difficult for me to do even my ususal things,his thoughts surround me in what ever work im engaged in. Very hard to stop thinking about him.We both work in same concern too. Its been 10 days since this quarrel happened still not yet solved. Finally i decided if he dont wish to talk to me and if he gets happiness in hurting me, im ready to accept this pain for his happiness. Can anyone help me with ur thoughts

  2. #2
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    You quoted "This is the first time he is behaving to me in such manner". Which leads me to believe you have quarreled many times, and worked it out, but this time he has had enough of it. Guys do not like fighting, confrontations, nagging, b itching or a miserable GF. Maybe you are too much of a downer with your moods so he has ditched you. 10 days without contact after a tiny fight? That should tell you he wants you to go away. It's a weak way, but it seems pretty evident he is done with this relationship.

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    Yep, what smackie said. He's done. Time to move on.

  4. #4
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    Hi,

    Thank you smackie for your advise and to say openly the advise what you gave is fit for nothing. do u think is it that much easy to give up once love & memories and have a break up for no reason. It seems very awkward that i am adviced to go away for no reason and please stop blaming girls. Im not a kind to flirt or have fun with, in name of love which is full of emotions. Im looking for a serious advice to get patched up with him.

  5. #5
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    OP, smackie9 gave you an opinion on the situation that I think many people, myself included, would agree with. You didn't give any details about your fight or your other fights, etc. So we can only go off what you tell us. And you told us that you and your bf had a fight and that he hangs up every time he hears your voice. People hang up on someone when they don't want to talk to them. So it is logical to assume that he wants nothing more to do with you.
    And you aren't being advised to go away from the relationship. It sounds like your boyfriend has already to do that himself. We are just trying to get you to realize that might be the case here.

    I am sorry if you don't like this assessment. No one said a breakup is easy. Heck, breakups hurt bad. They always do. It just seems like in this case, your boyfriend is breaking up with you without having the breakup conversation.

    I have no idea how to advise you to patch things up with your boyfriend, but I would start with stopping the calls and SMS messages. Let him contact you when he is ready.
    Brought to you by Dating With Devon!

  6. #6
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    I never said for you to give up or go away that was the other poster. I just gave you my "perspective" or the situation, guided by my own life experience. What to do? The only thing left is to hunt him down and talk to him in person which you should have done in the first place.

    It's just another case of "I don't want to hear about it, now tell me what I want to hear".

  7. #7
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    recently i had a small fight with my boy friend for no reason.
    You might think it is "no reason", but he might think it is a big reason, which explains why he won't even talk to you.

    - How many other fights have you had in the past 3 months?
    - How did they start?
    - How did they end?
    - What does HE think about these fights? He is part of the relationship too.

    I have to agree with the other posters. My first guess is you have had a lot of fights and he is tired of it. Admitting you are wrong and saying you are sorry are good steps, but only if the fighting stops or slows considerably. If you two are prone to fighting, maybe you are not very compatible? Compatible people do not fight very much at all, or the fights are not very serious.

    So, please give us more details and we can help you more.
    - How old are you and your bf?
    - How long have you been dating without a breakup?
    - If you have broken up and gotten together again, how long has it been since the first date and how many breakups have you had?
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Martina Thomas View Post
    Hi,

    Thank you smackie for your advise and to say openly the advise what you gave is fit for nothing. do u think is it that much easy to give up once love & memories and have a break up for no reason. It seems very awkward that i am adviced to go away for no reason and please stop blaming girls. Im not a kind to flirt or have fun with, in name of love which is full of emotions. Im looking for a serious advice to get patched up with him.
    So what do you wish to do, genius? You planning on hiding in the bushes outside his house? Or just keep calling him over and over until he answers? Maybe wait for him outside of work? That's called stalking.

    Regardless of why, regardless of how you feel, HE'S DONE WITH YOU. You can't change that without breaking laws.

  9. #9
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    We dint have any fights in the past 3 months.
    Im 22 and my BF is 28
    We were dating without breakup for one year, we usually date twice a month. I called him recently and spoke with my BF. He dint talk to me in the manner of getting away from me. We had a polite discussion and he told that he was very busy with some meeting so that was the reason for not talking to me.
    Last edited by Martina Thomas; 14-09-11 at 04:08 PM.

  10. #10
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    so nice of you Smackie :-)

  11. #11
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    So you and your bf work at the same company, so that means you must live near each other, but you only see each other twice a month? Why so little?

    Does he have another girlfriend?
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

  12. #12
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    No,Since we both work for same concern we meet every day. We talk and also have fun in personal very often, We go outing only twice a month because of our tight schedule at work since we both are in a responsible position. He dont have any other Girlfriends.

  13. #13
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    Well when someone does a 180, the usual suspect is that they have another interest. It truly wouldn't surprise me.

  14. #14
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    Hai all,
    We both have patched up now, we both are very happy now after speaking and expressing each others love on us. Thanks for all your advices though some helped and some were useless.

  15. #15
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    Glad you worked it out, but:

    Quote Originally Posted by Martina Thomas View Post
    Thanks for all your advices though some helped and some were useless.
    Even those replies that you deemed "useless" still took the time to try to help you by sharing their thoughts. Updating your thread to complain about the advice you got here was unnecessary and really kind of bitchy. Don't ask a forum full of internet strangers for their opinion and then be upset by what you're told.

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