Why is he playing games with me? I thought that was for females??

[lovesick3409]

So, I have been on this rollercoaster for a year now. I fell head over heels for my best guy friend first year of college...and there were no return feelings. After months of trying to figure out what was wrong with me, he decided to tell me over the summer he was gay and he's sorry that we wouldn't be able to work things out. I spent a couple of weeks completely heartbroken, never feeling that way before....blah blah blah.

Anyways, we come back to college and we're closer than ever. We might as well been a couple without the kissing and sex. We hugged (typical), cuddled, held hands, massaged each other. He would go further, lifting up my shirt, putting his hands in my crotch region, rubbing my inner thighs, playful fighting. Of course, instead of getting over him, I fell further for him. Then all of a sudden, he said "we should stop doing this". Excuse me, WTF? I never was the one to come on to him, he was the one coming on to me! Why would he do this, if he KNOWS I'm attracted to him??

Any other guy and I would have dropped his behind LONGGGG ago, but he's my best friend. We've been through so many other things, and I literally have no other good friends to turn to, and my family is 4 hours away, and I barely talk to them anyway. Without him, I would relatively be alone....

What should I do? Any advice would be so very much appreciated.

[Wakeup]

You should "stop doing this" like he said and just be each other's cuddle bitches .. slash .. best friends while you get yourself away from him long enough to find a guy that is into women.

[lovesick3409]

I should stop....keep doing what we're doing...AND get away from it all? Sorry, I don't understand?

[Wakeup]

He told you that you guys "should stop doing this" so bloody well stop doing it.. this cuddling, the caressing and crap that is causing you to have feelings for him and go find a guy that actually wants to be with you. (a woman). As long as you keep this ONE SIDED crush you have going for him you'll never see the beauty in other men and you'll stangnate being his cuddle bitch and nothing more. You're wasting your time so stay away from him for a while until you douse the flames you have for him, find yourself a real romantic boyfriend and then be the gay guys female friend.

Don't waste anymore of your time trying to pursue him into wanting you the way you want him. In otherwords: Stop the flirting and the cuddling and the mutual massaging because its' making you want him the way you can't have him he doesn't feel the same way for you as you feel for him so stop torturing yourself.

Capice?

[bulrush]

I fell head over heels for my best guy friend first year of college...and there were no return feelings.

Try to go slower with the emotional side next time.

Excuse me, WTF? I never was the one to come on to him, he was the one coming on to me!

And you let him. That was your answer. You let him, which means you were fine with the arrangement.

As for what to do now, stop cuddling and touching. Maybe even cut all contact, or at least don't be in a room alone together. A real gay guy would not touch a woman like that. I just don't believe he is gay. He might be bi, but not gay. Gay guys think girls are "icky".

[Wakeup]

Gay guys think girls are "icky".

uhm no, gay guys love certain women as freinds and as idols. Cher for instance as well as Bette Midler have a HUGE gay fan base. Gay men make the best friends (every gal should have one *winks*) and they only think women are "icky" between the sheets outside they don't usually have much of a problem in general. Don't fall for your gay friend though or, you will end up like OP.

Now, the possibility exists that he isn't actually gay but since he's told you (OP) that he is, I'd take his word for it. I doubt he'd tell you, his friend that he was gay if he wasn't because you'll certainly know when/if he gets himself in a relationship with a girl so he couldn't maintain the lie. That's the logical way to look at things anyway.

[lovesick3409]

Got it, Wakeup.

After (hopefully not a friendship-breaking) argument, I told him we should cut all contact, and spend some time apart. I have no idea what or who I'm going to turn to while alone, but I guess this is a good time to go above and beyond on homework...