I found it so hard...

[lakers.rulez]

I've just got dumped by my EX now of 8 yrs relationship. We lived together for 6 yrs. It has been a little more than four months now since the official break-up. We still seeing each other on and off for about 3 months after that (I know it's bad idea). I've returned the keys to her last Saturday. I found it so hard to let her go. Something is keeping on telling me to do not give up on her and that we'll be together again. I've been through a very painful stage of my life. This is so much harder than I expected. I don't hate her. Matter of fact, I blamed myself for holding on to her for so long and not marrying her. However, I found it so hard for not really know the truth why we broke up. She said that "I don't feel the love...Lets just be friend". I just can't believe that it was recently we still talking about having kids and settling down... Now, it's totally the opposite. Why the story switched instantly. I've also noticed that she mentioned about one guy quite often on her conversation. I'm totally trusted her for all these years. But I think our broke up gotta do with that person. I am not the type of person to go sneak around and find out or stalking her. I won't do that. I just want the truth so my heart can let go easier.

I have returned the keys to her house that I am basically remodel everything there... I just found the courage to delete her phone number off and also removed her email address. What should I do next... It's so heart broken knowing I won't be able to be with her now and the future. Why the heck is it so so hard to let go...

[James Banes]

Let me get this straight: she dumped you and you're remodeling her house?

[Simple Love]

Let her go for now...There is always a chance you guys can get back together in the future...For now give the both of you a little time to breathe...

[lakers.rulez]

I remodeled her house for more than a year then she dumped me after. I don't really care much about doing work for her cuz' I really love her. It just bothers me so much that she could have give me the easy way out and sit w/ me and talk it out after knowing each others for more than 8 years. That should be the least she can do for me. But instead she choose to give me the vague answer over the phone and don't want to see me in person. She ignored me since then... I've treated her too nice... I didn't even curse or yelling at her during the phone break-up. I was forcefully accepted - what can I do right? This really sux...

[lizzy-bet]

I am inclined to believe there was another man she was interested in. She may have never had sex with him, but it's hard for me to believe she completely disengaged herself emotionally from you if there wasn't someone else there providing that support. I don't know what else to say besides that, you'll find out soon enough. I'd just keep really busy and wouldn't blame myself. It's her own fault she threw it out the window, not yours.

[lakers.rulez]

Lizzy-bet,

I expected it. For some reason, I felt like a big loser and started to blame myself... I thought love is pure but i guess ppl change over time. I would do anything to get this feeling to go away but it doesn't seem to work. I guess this can be my constant reminder to take care of myself first and not to regret later...

[lakers.rulez]

Let her go for now...There is always a chance you guys can get back together in the future...For now give the both of you a little time to breathe...

At the moment, I would love to have that chance but I know it's not going to happen. I surely hope she'll be happy and not end up like me (being dumped). I'd rather be the one that suffers.

[lakers.rulez]

Just lil update:

I emailed her yesterday (I deleted all contacts however I still remember her email address... it's in my head) NOT because I wanted to see her as I knew she works today. I asked her to have a few items of mines back as we do lived together for years before the break-up. I asked her to leave the items in the front door before she goes to work and mentioned that I don't need to key to the house (just want my items to go to the beach and start to enjoy life when time permits). Well, she told me this morning before work that she left the key at a secret place and asked me to help her cut nails and hair for her dog (basically our dog - he only allows me to cut his nails and hair and no one else). I trained him for months to sit, lay-down, begging, roll-overs, etc... for months. I do love that dog and really really missed him. He always happy to see me as I play with him a lot when she is at work. Very cute lil dog. Anyway, back to the topic. I told myself that I will only do things and think of myself first; however, this is regarding the dog that I love and he has nothing to do with the break-up. I think and want to cut the hair for him and his nails as I know and don't want him to be uncomfortable with long nails and hair that is probably blocking his view. As the same time, I don't want to do this for her and a couple weeks later...she will be asking me do that again. I really love that lil boy (I always refer him as "lil boy"). What should I do? Any advices?

Thanks,