Why do you love me ?

[JucheeCheejju]

I met my wife a year ago, we are married 6 months now, we both love each other a lot, but there is always this one situation that kinds of gets us into an argument, and I want opinions of all you true lovers out there.

She keeps asking me "why do you love me ?" and I keep telling her my true feelings.....which is, I love her WITHOUT any reason, because in my opinion to love someone for a reason is selfishness, and I love her selflessly !!!. Also in my opinion if you love someone for a quality or a reason, let's say with time and age if that person looses that quality.....what ? you would stop to love that person ?.

Ladies and gentlemen ....help me out over here.....Am I right or wrong ? should I have a reason to love her ?

[imissher]

Stop answering until you get to the root cause of her asking you that question. Ask her directly, and follow up each response from her with question that probes deeper into her response.

[devonbrown]

Why not change how you answer her. Instead of saying you love her for no reasons, tell her you love her for EVERY reason she can think of.

It sounds like she just wants you to compliment her and make her feel good about herself. I don't know if she is insecure or has self-esteem issues, but that could be a possibility.

Think about what she wants out of that question, rather than just treating it like a test question from school.

Good luck.

[Boisdevie]

She sounds very insecure.
On another note, you got married after being together for 6 months? Isn't that a bit fast? Why the rush?

[elny1]

"Our chemistry is immaculate"
"I can't imagine being with anyone else"
"You're my best friend"

theres a good start.

If you search deep down and analyze what makes you feel good when you see or hear or think about the suspense you feel when you can't wait to see your girl, I'm sure you can put some of these things into words. You can even say things like "When I think of you an infinite number of feelings and words and emotions marvel in my mind"

"you complete me"...

I can go on and on.

[bulrush]

Women need specific complements. You need to tell her WHY you love her. Does she have a good sense of humor? Is she loving and kind? Is she helpful around the house? Does she help you with your chores? Is she beautiful? Women like to know they are still beautiful to their man.

[JucheeCheejju]

Hi all,

Firstly, thank you everyone for your input in this delicate matter.

Like suggested by you all, yes i have tried every stunts and tried to tell her almost everything that she wants to listen, but she is not satisfied, she just thinks that I am wrong in the first place to come up with the fact that love does not need a reason, so if all of you can just tell me one thing ?.

In my opinion "Love" doesn't need a reason .......true or false ?

[JucheeCheejju]

Hi all,

Firstly, thank you everyone for your input in this delicate matter.

Like suggested by you all, yes i have tried every stunts and tried to tell her almost everything that she wants to listen, but she is not satisfied, she just thinks that I am wrong in the first place to come up with the fact that love does not need a reason, so if all of you can just tell me one thing ?.

In my opinion "Love" doesn't need a reason .......true or false ?

[bulrush]

In my opinion "Love" doesn't need a reason .......true or false ?

Since men and women are wired differently, and have different needs, the answer to your question could not apply equally to both sexes. For men, love doesn't need a reason. For women, it does. Which is why we gave you specific advice to say specific things to her. Tell us exactly what you said to her and we'll figure out what went wrong.

[Andariel]

Has anything happened between the two of you that makes her feel insecure about your relationship and your feelings about her?Sometimes people can be really insecure and no matter how many times you tell them you love them and you have deep feelings for them they still won't believe it, not because you are doing something wrong, but because they do not feel 'good enough' to be loved.

Why do you think she is asking you this question?The reason behind it is very important. If you have done or said something that has made her doubt your feelings this is the time to tell you about it so that you can work through this together.If she is just insecure then it doesn't matter what you say-she is not going to believe you. She would need to start looking within herself to find out what makes her feel this way. Perhaps she just wants to hear that you love her for specific qualities so maybe she is thinking that if you can't give her a solid reason why you love her, then you probably don't truly love or appreciate her.

Bottom line: talk about this with her, find out why she is asking you this question all the time, have an open discussion and hopefully you can get to the bottom of this together.

[searock]

Since men and women are wired differently, and have different needs, the answer to your question could not apply equally to both sexes. For men, love doesn't need a reason. For women, it does. Which is why we gave you specific advice to say specific things to her. Tell us exactly what you said to her and we'll figure out what went wrong.

I think it actually varies from person to person, whether they're male or female.