I may be SOL.

[StarsFootball58]

Alright guys, I need some help. There's this girl that I really like but I may have gotten stuck in the friend zone. She says I'm her best friend so I accept the title. I am still in love with her since we went out over spring break. We talked one night for hours on the phone about each others feelings for one another, so she knows I love her, and she said she loves me to. But in a different kind of way. She still really really loves her ex boyfriend who moved to Texas, so I think it's a matter of time until she gives up on him. In the mean time, do you have any advice on what I can do to help ensure that we end up together?

[skyliner33]

I don't really have a profound explanation for you, but I think you should give up on it. It has been what, 6-7 months? If she still has feelings for her ex its just not something worth it to continue pursuing her for a relationship. If you really want to be her friend then there's no reason to completely cut ties with her, but you have established yourself as a friend to her and not someone she's interested in for a sexual/intimate relationship.

[bulrush]

She still has feelings for her ex after 6-7 months? Then she's really stuck on him. Time for you to move on and find a girl who loves you back the way you need.

[Violet light]

do you want the feelings of happiness, contentment that is triggered by this person or are you caught in a fantasy about wanting what you can not have?

You can have a relationship with any one on the planet if you choose?
Though to do this, you have to exhibit the qualities that the other person feels represent support, emotional strength, adventure & patience?

From my way of thinking? A strong person is one who can walk away from the person they are attracted to in order to give them space to think & feel free.
Put another way; Let go of the one you love & by doing so you will show them that you have the strength to allow them to be free? This action will define you as being different from all the others who want to own &/or control them.

Luv is a quality with in yourself, which is triggered by another who possesses the strengths that you do not currently exhibit, examples of this strength may be tenderness, vulnerability, a strong sense of adventure or sensitive, ruthless honesty about expressing ones feelings?

am sure if you let go of the notion of a relationship with this person & just enjoy those times when this person chooses to be with you, that person will start to see you in a more favorable light?

Letting go takes more strength than hanging on, what have you got to loose? What you currently have is not satisfying & if this person is appropriate then admiration for you will grow?

[James Banes]

You're in the friend-zone, dude. It's easier to swim from the Caribbean to Greece then go from being a friend to a boyfriend.

[Wakeup]

You may be able to work your way over to the "potential ladder" from the "friends ladder" if you STOP BEING HER MALE GIRLFRIEND. Start treating her like someone you are attracted to PHYSICALLY, not just in the emotional realm. Flirt, avoid calling her and let her contact you for a change, don't do shit for her unless its totally convenient for you to do so, don't let her talk to you about her ex boyfriend.. stop her and tell her you don't want to hear about it. Stop everything you've done so far and begin again with her like you've just met her and you want her. Stop being her cuddle beotch too if you're sleeping with her in the same bed and not doing her.

Main thing to do is to stop being the one who initiates all the contact and to give her a chance to miss you. If she doesn't contact you then do not contact her and let yourself get over your crush so you can persue women who actually find you masculine and attractive and not view you as a girlfriend with dangly bits.

[StarsFootball58]

Thanks for the advice guys. Over these past days since I posted this I've actually made a lot of progress. Im not her male girlfriend by the way. That's just stupid. She came over yesterday and it got pretty physical. She says that she still feels the old "spark" from back when we went out. I've learned that the more I talk about other girls that I know and would possibly like to get with, the more she wants to be with me. It seems like this new game plan will end up leading to where I want it to. She has told me she still has feelings for me, and that was back when we first started talking again, so who knows how she feels now. Like I said, we are great friends but there's still that attraction to one another and you can easily tell if you heard how we talk to eachother. As far as always contacting her first, I usually have to because I text off of my iPod and not my phone, so I text her whenever I have wifi, otherwise she would be trying to text me but it wouldnt work. And lately she's just been calling my house whenever (we are still in high school so it's usually nice to know when she calls because then I can be ready for it and my parents won't make it awkward). So yeah, that's where I'm at and it's going great. I've never really allowed myself to get stuck in the friend zone before so I need some help crawling out of the hole haha. But I appreciate all the advice you guys have shared with me.