Advice needed.

[mala]

Ok i hope this is not too long, ill try to make it as short as possible. i need advice for a situation. Im a very nice person, im educated, have a very good job, very good looking, nice personality n all. i have never had a serious relationship before (not because i never got approached, i didnt think it was ryt at that time with that particular person) and a year an a half ago i met a guy. at a club. im not that kind of a person who would even talk to a random guy, but that night i danced with him, n i really liked him. he was nice and was a true gentlemen. people categorize me as very sophisticated, and he is the kind of person i always wanted to be with. we exchanged numbers, he was from a different country. we kept in touch and later had a long distance relationship which lasted for 2 months. when we were together it was perfect. we had similar tastes in things n very much alike yet different at the same time. we used to talk alot. i knw it was just 2 months but we also talked about marriage. (we are from the same cultural background and marriage at our age (25ish) is quite natural ). i really fell for him and one day i realized i was in love with him. since we had a good relationship i was never afraid to tell him about my real feelings. he told me that if he dsnt say the L word yet it doesn't mean that he is not having feelings for me but he wants to be real sure and wants it to be real special wen he tells me. everything was perfect. ok now more details about our us : in our culture the daughter in law has to have alot of responsibilities and should be very respectful. my family n i r very modern. his family is not so. if i hadnt met him i would never have wanted to marry into a family like his. but since i knw him n i love him truly it was never a problem and being the person he is i always trusted him to make the right decision. my being the way im was always a concern but i always assured him that i will be able to do it. things were ok, we had a good relationship where we could always talk about things, no fights nothing. it never felt that we were so far away frm each other, he never felt this way with his other exs, so i thik that the thot scared him a bit that he is having so much feelings for me. (if ever one could say match made in heaven it was us) one day he asked me for some space, which basically meant minimizing our communication. i had problems at first, but than i started thinking that its too soon so we shud have some space. although it killed me i gave him his space. now here problems start. my very good friend was living with me at that time, n she could see how it all affected me. i used to think abt him all the time n my health had deteriorated and other things. so she pretending to be me sent him a couple of messages. messages like pleading him to come back, n threatening him that ill kill myself n all. (i didnt knw abt this) as it was, my ex was still trying to figure things for us when he used to get all these messages which he thot was frm me. n it further pushed him away frm me emotionally. eventually things ended up between us, n i never knew what went wrong. i always thot about him n was not able to move on. six months ago i heard that he got engaged. now im not a mean person, n would never do anything wrong to anyone. the situation of his engagement is such: his family found hima girl, who lives in my country (arranged marriage in my culture is veryyyy normal) she is all daughter in law material. but they are so mis matched. she is not educated, is a high school dropout. yes she is pretty, but she is how shud i say. not matched at all. i was very upset but it was his life n his choice. it has been a long time since things ended between us, but my feelings for him never changed. my friend recently confessed about the messages. im not mad at my friend as she thot she was doing good for me. now no matter what happens im thinking what if my fiend had not messed up things. would this guy have fallen in love with me? im planning to take a holiday soon, to his country, i want to meet him, give him a chance to knw the real person that im. i dnt knw ,this idea sounds sooo good to me. im so happy that i may see him. so yes, i dnt knw what to do. sory for all the spelling errors, i typed this in a rush.

[ames]

i think that the only advice that you need is to get over yourself

[IndiReloaded]

Punctuation and paragraph breaks would help for starters.

The best indication of your issue is how others respond to you. Your attitude is grating, just based on your post. You'd be amazed how many very classy, intelligent people there are out there. I wonder what else they have you don't? I suspect your progressive attitude has put him and his family off. You're probably better off finding someone more compatible. Family is important.

[mala]

woah....i have earned this attitude after real hard work and will not apologies for it. what i needed was advice on my situation n not insult about what i may or may not be. thanks anyways for responding, i think i should trust myself better than any posts.