Should I even care what she thinks

[Toddstar]

My ex (see previous threads, I really dont want to rehash our past) sent me an email regarding my new girlfriend; she said she wants to see who I chose to be my spouse and she wants to be friendly with her as she will be a part of our sons life and she would be raising him if anything happened to her.

WTF? Who I chose? I chose HER (my ex) and SHE tossed me aside. Why do I care (and I seem to care) what she thinks of my new gf? And why does she care who I chose? She was the one that chose to let another man move in with her and my son after a month of dating...and now she is concerned about who I hang with? I dont even bring my gf to drop off/pick ups for our son, alothough her bf INSISTS on coming to every pick up/drop off because he doesnt trust her to be alone with me! I dont like seeing him but I suck it up and put on the brave face for my son. My ex said the day she does meet my gf she will be very hurt but still wants to meet her. I'm a grown man. This seems so childish.

I know my ex has obvious esteem issues, but she made her choces a long time ago. Why am I still affected by her decisions?

[stuckies]

all of you grow up. Of course everyone's partner should be civil with each other when there are kids involved. They don't have to like each other but not act like a bunch of kids..in front of your son.

[Wakeup]

she wants to see who I chose to be my spouse

Please tell me that you've not moved this girl in with you. You can't have been seeing this girl for more than two freaking dates. What does she mean by your "spouse?"

If it's a new dating situation then tell her that once you figure out if you'll even introduce her to your son once you've become seriously involved, (because neither of you should be bringing new "spouses" in and out of your children's lives every other week that then she can call her a "spouse."

Todd you need to let this go. You take offense or you're on guard about everything she says and does which means you're no where near being over her or getting on properly with your life. Be careful who you bring around your children. Be careful with birth control (you don't want to have to marry yet another mother of a child and be careful what you are teaching your young boy. Last thing we need is yet another young man thinking that women are horrible people.

My suggestion; If you have bought this new girl around your son already that you introduce her to your ex "spouse." WTF is the difference?

You two need to start thinking less about what the other did to you and more about your son's best interests.

Sorry, but your son is more important than your's and your wives issues.

[Toddstar]

No no, my friend has not met my kids, she hasnt met my ex, and I doubt very highly I will ever marry her. All the words relating to "spouse" were from my ex. I am quite happy to keep things distant from everyone; there is enough damage being done from my ex with her weird words.

[Wakeup]

Then just tell your ex to rest assured that if you ever meet someone that you would consider introducing to your son (children) because it's become serious then you will introduce her you your ex then. There is no point in you introducing every date you have to her. End of and you forget she even asked or used stupid boarderline personality disordered requests of you.

Simple.

BTW: How does she even know that you're dating someone new? Is she having you followed as well?

[Toddstar]

I am not sure! I guess its my ego that makes me think these things about her, its a little bruised and I am a little jealous of the fact she found someone she wanted to live with so quick after she turfed me. I know my life is better off without her but still, all the same, its kinda sad.

[Wakeup]

She is the type of woman that cannot live alone and needs someone to take care of her. Tell your ego to STFU because there is no reason for it to be belly aching because she will settle with the next thing that looks her way. Ewwww! You realize that she doesn't even know who he is and the chances are extremely high that once this honeymoon is over, so will the relationship be. She seems to have a pattern of discarding after the honeymoon period, don't you agree?

[Toddstar]

I do agree. Still pisses me off though.