Am I asking too much?

[SecretlySad]

Yesterday my very close work friend told me she is planning on getting married July 2013, in either Las Vegas or Hawaii and she would like my boyfriend and I to be part of the small group of people she wants there for her special day.

I am ecstatic at the idea - I believe life is about living and prefer a hedonistic lifestyle, but I wonder if I am asking too much of my boyfriend?

My friend is very well off and she and her family are paying for all their guests’ accommodation and group activities (I’m assuming tours, sightseeing etc) for 5 days so we’d only have to worry about flights and spending money. She has given us a year and a half to save up which I think is plenty of time.

My boyfriend and I have a lot of money saved between us. It is to buy a home someday, but I personally am in NO rush to do this. I am happy to continue renting and just grateful that I am fortunate enough to have a roof over my head. He is in much more of a rush because of his age (me 29, him 46).

What do you think?

[surfhb]

Whats the question?

[bcgirl]

well you two have a year and a half to save up for this. Since it's your friend, perhaps you should pay the majority of your and his flights/accomodations for the wedding trip. Like perhaps pay 75% of his part and he only has to pay 25%

[SecretlySad]

Sorry I should add we live in Australia.

[IndiReloaded]

well you two have a year and a half to save up for this. Since it's your friend, perhaps you should pay the majority of your and his flights/accomodations for the wedding trip. Like perhaps pay 75% of his part and he only has to pay 25%

They are buying a house together. Why can't he come up with his share of the flight? Other than the wedding itself, its a holiday. The accommodation is being paid for. If he doesn't want to go, then go alone.

[bcgirl]

I'm sort of in the same situation as you. I live in Canada, my friend is having a wedding next year in Hawaii. My husband and I were invited (she is not paying for the trip). I want to go, but it's not my husband's friend...my husband and I don't roll around in money so things like a trip to Hawaii would take a lot of planning and saving up and quite honestly we aren't able to do it. I don't expect him to be putting his extra money into the trip to hawaii when he's been really wanting to save his extra money on a new music equipment (his hobby is music) which he's been trying to do for a long time. We put our money together to save for things we need around the house like a new sofa, a down payment for a new house, savings for a baby (since we're planning to expand our family in the near future). So our left over money is really to pay our bills and the basics. Don't think Hawaii is happening for me unless i win the lottery.

[Boisdevie]

Here's an idea. Don't go. And stop polluting the planet with all this ****ing air travel 'because I deserve it'.
Oh and get a boyfriend who is nearer your age.

[bulrush]

I guess it's all about your preferences. I've been to Maui once, it was beautiful, but the price for me is just not worth it to go again. I'm upside down on my mortgage, as are many Americans (due to banker hijinks), so I would prefer to spend money on reducing debt or acquiring appreciable assets.

[malteser]

Just talk to him about it. Tell him you would like to go but you understand if he doesn't. Then you can let him decide, which is the most considerate thing to do. It's obvious you are thinking of him so just tell him that.