Ex bf cried

[lazyblue]

Hey, just wanted people's opinions on something that happened today. Quick background: was with my ex for 6 years. It was the first serious relationship for both of us. He broke up with me almost 7 months ago as he said he was no longer in love with me. It was all very sudden and there were no warning signs.

Today we met up as I had some of his stuff at my parents house that I wanted to give back. We haven't seen each other since we broke up and we barely talked (just a few emails). It was great seeing him, it wasn't awkward at all, felt like meeting up with an old friend. In fact, we were having such a good catch up that we decided to go to a pub for a couple of hours. Afterwards he dropped me off at my parents house and he started crying. He wasn't like properly sobbing his eyes out or anything, but was still crying nonetheless. I asked what was wrong and he said that it's sad to think about what happened (meaning that we broke up). I said well yeah it's sad that we broke up but he ended it for a reason so ultimately it's a good thing and he just said several times that it's still sad.

I was not expecting this at all. He's your typical guy, doesn't really cry much. So I was quite surprised that he cried- I mean I didn't (nor did I feel like I wanted to). So just wondering what people make of that. He also said that I seem better off without him and looked kinda sad when he said it.

I should also mention that he is seeing someone and started seeing her about a month after we broke up. He told me who it is that he is seeing and I was very surprised because he's mentioned her before and she has got some pretty extreme mental health problems- so extreme that she hasn't worked in over 8 years. There's two reasons why it surprised me that he's dating her; 1. I used to have bad depression and that really took its toll on him I know he thought about leaving me several times because he couldn't cope (but didn't becaused he loved me). 2. I was out of work for 3 years due to ill health (nothing to do with my mental health- I was depression free at this point) and we both kinda agreed that probably he fell out of love because he ended up being my carer. I know you can't help who you fall for but I'm very surprised he got into another relationship with someone with significant health issues. She's bipolar and it must be pretty bad to stop her working for so long. He used to say that he doesn't think she will ever work. He didn't look particularly happy when he spoke about her, but on the other hand they've been together for getting on for 6months so he must be happy. But that kinda makes our breakup make even less sense now. I could pretty much understand him breaking up with me if he felt like he was my carer, but it doesn't make sense that hes gone into another relationship like that. My health fortunately is loads better and I now work full time- which I think is why he said I seem better off because obviously with working comes new friends, more confidence etc so it probably seems that way but actually is nothing to do with him not being my bf. Just thought that might be relevant to the situation.

[malteser]

When people break up having been in a long term relationship, unless it's a messy breakup (due to an affair etc) then it's normal to feel sad about how things turned out. I still cry now nearly a year after I ended my 9 year relationship, not because I want him back or anything but because it's sad to think back to happy times and know that I ended it with him. He was a decent guy and it was a shame that I fell out of love with him. Finding out he is due to be a dad knocked me for six, even though it was me that ended it, so I think he probably just found it hard seeing you again and because you had a good chat etc it might have reminded him of old times. Don't read too much into it, and don't try to understand why he is with the girl he is seeing now. Continue with your new found friends/confidence and move on.

[madotnw_nihs]

I totally agree with the above. I didn't cry when I see my ex's, but I definitely could have. Just reminiscing the past made me miss it, and it also made me happy. I think it is a good thing he cried, but don't read too much into it.

[lazyblue]

I think the fact that I was hoping it meant something means that I'm not ready to be in contact and I told him so yesterday. So it's helpful to know that it probably didn't mean anything anyway.

[BoredGeorge]

Real men don't cry, especially not infront of women. The only time men are allowed to cry is if someone important dies and only then in the privacy of your own room, preferably at night when everyone else is asleep. Crying over some girl is strictly gay. You are lucky to be free from him.