Hi everyone,
I am stuck in a difficult situation. I have been dating a girl 18months my senior for 2 years now. She's an amazing person and I trust her more than I trust myself. I love her very much and the thought of creating a family with her brings a smile to my face. I am currently 28 and she's 30.
Despite the numerous positive features of our relationship, I am having a hard time getting over the age difference. I don't find anything inherently wrong with marrying someone 18 months my senior, but I worry about the consequences it may have in the long term. You see, I was raised by parents who strongly believe that a husband should be at least 5 years older than his wife. My parents claim that women mature and age faster, and while a man looks 'distinguished' in lets say his 50's, a woman just looks plain 'old'.
So here I am worrying that my girlfriend will soon lose her looks while I am just entering my prime. Btw, my gf is a healthy beautiful woman but she does certainly look 30. I worry that in no time she'll be 40 and I'll lose my sexual desires for her due to her ageing.
I've become somewhat obsessive about this issue and it occupies my mind day and night. I keep reading online articles that describe women as being outside their prime after their late twenties and stories about how it's all downhill after 30. I am very frightened by the ageing female body and this has prevented me from committing to a girl i truly love.
Now you might say that "if you truly loved her, you wouldn't think this way!". I strongly disagree with this notion. I believe that sex and physical attraction are some of the most important pillars of a relationship. While I might love my gf in a million ways, a lack of sexual attraction down the road could spell disaster for our relationship.
I am a professional with a good salary. I am fit and above-average looking. I definitely have tons and tons of options out there, esp. given that educated intellectual girls interested in marriage outnumber their male counterparts (at least this is what I have observed. I know so many good girls who can't find a decent guy.) Having said that, I think my gf is an amazing partner and a rare find for my needs in life.
So it comes down to this: do i marry this girl and risk her ageing faster than me OR do i move on and find someone much younger who would look youthful for possibly an extra decade.
Any ideas, thoughts, opinions?