Hello Everyone, my name is Drew. This is my first time asking anyone like this about a relationship problem and honestly, I am just looking for some straight advice. No BS. I always find comfort in hearing other peoples perspectives on life so I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this and comment. So hear it goes.......

About 3 months ago I walked into a class on campus that I would have to meet 1 time for the whole term, and the rest was online. Right when I walked in there was a girl sitting in the middle of the room. The second I saw her I knew there was something about her. To make a long story short I saw an oppurtunity to talk to her after class, took it and the rest is history. We began dating from there and things were really amazing. We have a good amount of things in common and ultimately I felt we both loved everything about each other. To say the least I was one happy guy and could easily tell she was one happy girl.

About 2 weeks into our relationship she sat me down and explained to me that she had something she needed to tell me before we go any further with the relationship. She had struggled with an eating disorder and a drug problem in her past. I told her that this was not something that was going to scare me away and she explained that she had been through rehab and ben recovered for over a year now. I never had any reason to doubt her so I told her that I am not here to judge her about her past. As we continued to date 1 thing I want to note that I started noticing was that she would constantly have a drink before bed. Every night.... Now my mom has a gin and tonic before bed and I never have thought twice about it because my mom is my mom I guess hahaha, I know everyone has their stress releivers or whatever. But one night was going into work and then got fired on the spot due to an alchohol related issue. I am not going to make assumptions as to wether she was drinking before work or it was from the night before where we went out and did have a lot to drink (and this is where the eating disorder I think comes back into play) but regardless, she took that pretty hard. Obviosuly she lost her job and had to worry about getting a new one to pay rent for the next month, but she had to postpone acceptance into the nursing program at school due to her having to leave her schedule as open as possible. Needless to say I could tell she took it pretty hard. Thats when I started noticing she was acting depresses sometimes. Not all the time but still it was noticable. One day I decided to bring it up to her and she got defensive, we got in a small argument but then later she called me back and told me to come over. She sat me down and told me she had been falling back into bad habbits. She explained that she had been doing the eating thing again, and told me that she never really got over it and had been doing it since we met,and while she never told me she did, I think she was doing drugs again. Regardless I told her that I loved her and that I would stand by her side through anything.

After this talk things with us were fine even though I could tell she was still unhappy though. She made some headway with a new job and actually got the position so things seemed to be turning good for her. I tried to never ask about the eating thing but I knew she was still doing it but for some reason it didn't bother me I guess, I don't know I love her what can I say. Eitherway, about 2 weeks ago we were hanging out and she started to get really sick. She got sick for like 6 days. Very sick, she sounded terrible on the phone and had a very high fever for about 4 days. During this time she started acting a little strange. Now I want to point out that I never got the vibe that there was an issue of another guy invovled ever, but her behavior towards me slightly changed but noticable enough to bother me a little. She just started to get "forgetful" about calling me and not because I set an expectation of her in any way, just for 3 months straight she was consistent about calling me regularily so it was just abnormal behavior, but I didn't mention it to her. That weekend she started to feel better on friday and told me she is going to hang in tonight and we can hang out tomorrow. I said ok and went off to bed. Then I got woken up at 6:30 in the morning from her 3 missed calls.......... She decided to go out with a few of her friends later that night and got a DUI driving home. I was as supportive as possible to her and she said she was going home and gonna go to bed then she would call me. She called me later that day, I went over that night, the first thing she did when I walked in was walk up to me and kiss me with a big smile and we had a fun night, watched a movie, had sex, went to bed. It was a good night. I left in the morning and I kissed her goodbye.

We talked the next day and she had court in the morning so she would call me after to let me know how it went. She called me late the next day and told me about coourt and then another bomb that was dropped on her, the owner of her apartment had to forclose so she had 30 days to find a new place. I think for her this was her rock bottom..... Regardles though me and her had about a 30 minute conversation and spent over half of it talking and laughing with each other like was always do. We left it at she would call me later..... she never did. Then didn't call me for 2 days. I could tell something was up and that I got the picture that she didn't want to be in the relationship anymore. She had court again for driving privelages later in the week and she finally called me after that and told me what was up. She immediately said that she was sorry about not calling me and didn't mean to upset or worry by it, it's just that she has so much going on in her life right now she said she isn't ready for a relationship. She started to cry and said shes so sorry and hopes that we can still be friends and talk even though this next month is going to be very tough for her with the DUI, new job, and finding a new place. I told her that this doesn't mean I don't care about her, I am not angry at her, and that I am always her for her if she needs me and I would like to be friends too.

So that's the story, I am just stuck. I love this girl. And deep down, I think she loves me. As I think you guys can tell, things were never really bad between us, she just has a crazy amount of crap right now. She explained to me that this is what she does when she gets into her eating thing again she secludes herslef, pushes people away, and sits in her house all day and binges and then gets rid of it. But from day 1 I told her that I would not leave her because of that and I would support her through anything. I did tell her I hated the drug thing and I think for her that is why she never told me that she was doing it again( I could pretty much tell and her 1 friend she woould hang out with I knew did it.) But she would always cry to me saying how worried she was about me running off because of her problems but I told her I wouldn't. She would always tell me she would constantly think about what she has to do to keep me. But I guess what I am looking for is this.......

-I am aware that she made the decision to go at this alone or at least without me (I don't care what that reason is good or bad)
-I get that she has a lot of things going on and on a humbling personal note, I know she doesnt need to be worrying about me right now
-I truly love this girl, I know I do, and deep down, I think she feels the same, I never got the vibe that their was a discrepancy in feelings

So... should I just give it up, let it go, grow some balls, I dont know what to do. I know I kind of got myslef into a little more than I initially intended with her but when you know you love a girl you just know. But I get the fact that she just plain and simple might not love me anymore. I don't think that's the case but you never know.

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this and if anyone is so kind to give me some advice I hope that it's constructive in some way please.