Can someone please explain me this?

[boobaa]

Why is it that when I know a girl with whom I have so much in common, and who always comes to me for advice, and who tells me things she has never told anyone before, with who I spend great time, long interesting discussions about art, philosophy and life in general, has great exactly the same taste in music, movies, art and books, and almost every time with whom I end up having crazy sex with... she says she doesn't want a relationship, although month later she has a bf? And when he dumped her, she comes back to me, not asking me back, just wants to spend time with. But why nothing serious?

[gardenofjade]

Because you are a nice guy. Develop and edge like Batman and she'll stick around longer.
We don't want to have something in common, we have gaymenfriends for that. We want someone to protect us, to kick ass, to sweat testosterone, to take us places we've never been and make us try stuff we never have... otherwise you are boring.
got it Batman?

[boobaa]

I should be a ****ing clown? Protect from what?

Childhood is over, its time to work for goals, not blabber some shit.
Anyways I must thank you for reminding me why I am not that into her anymore.
Curiosity remains.

[gardenofjade]

There you go, move on and find the right one for you.
Be the sexy hot thing that you are and the perfect women will magically appear.

[boobaa]

While you are right, this is something that has bothered me for a while. Human behaviour in general. Generally, attention seeking adventurous women are childish and turn off. On the other hand, arguing is fun.

We don't live in 19'th century anymore. We have computers that form part of our identity, in fact, computer is part of our natural intelligence now, half of our information is stored there. Soon, there are chips connected to brain, to increase memory and calculation capacity. Bechause otherwise we would get too stressed, there is simply too much information flowing past and through us, and not enough brainpower to process it. This has already been done on rats. Your cell phone is more powerful than computer 12 years ago, there is a huge reach in technology and it has become almost invisible. Pretty soon we will have computers the size of a pill, and even smaller, Intel is working on that.
We spend a lot of time searching information with computer, and even communicating through it, flirting has reached new level. Pheromones have become the thing of the past, thats why there are so many relationship problems. A girl/boy can have a hot partner and still flirt on facebook with other people. There are no phermonones involved. Besides, people shave more and more. Biology is becoming a turn-off.
Human like artificial intelligence is not far off too. There are better recognition technologies than human mind, which model could be applied to any event processing, which in turn equates thought, until the thought reaches self-knowledge and umwelt. Plus the self forming virtual nerve system, creating new logic.
Traveling has become the thing of the past, you can reach other continents in less than one day. Soon, this will be even faster, with the new space technology, where we can travel outside the atmosphere, give it approx 8 years for the rich, 15 for the middle class. There is nothing much left to discover on our planet, no cultures, no new places. All can be viewed, reached, learned about.

We create our enviornments. Already we have the technology to print out functioning human organs (still prototype though), make energy from air with cells. We can create new plants, even animals, we can create cyborgs.

And yet, there is still this old thought about evolution. We, humans are reaching out of the evolutionary cycle. We are no more affected by the enviornment, we make the enviornment. We choose what we eat, who we want to be, how we want to be, how we want to appear. There are no pheromones. No natural selection. There are just people wanting to have sex. That is all.

And yet, the evolutionary traits remain. And its holding us back, our progression. Its the source of greed, jelausy and anger. Survival of the fittest, they say, but yet, there is no survival. Be skinny or fat, you can survive and gain sucess if you can cope with the technology. Otherwise you are pretty much nobody. So there is a big mix of that traditional buff-boy sexiness and actual intelligence which counts, creating all this confusion.

Think about it.


On topic:

I once told her about hacking. And she was amazed, and naive.

Don't be naive.

[gardenofjade]

I know, right!?! 1984!!!
We are all in our own pods, all secluded so what's the point of humanity!?!?!
The woman you are describing as the attention seeking adventurous does seem childish if she doesn't have the intelligence factor, eh? Seems like we are pumping out women who are pretty, and have personalities out of a magazine who can't think from themselves, Paris Hiltons, Housewives of somewhere... and they don't have the ability to dig deep into your brain to see all the fascinating stuff in there. I've seen it too, conversations go to small talk and politics, then it ends and drinking is the only option left. There is a serious lack of intelligence out there. But then you find someone with intelligence and they are prisoners of a job where they use their brain and by the time they get to you they are spent! So yeah, sex it the answer.

PS. My environment contains, water, fire, air, and earth. I'm surrounded by creatures in a garden of my own making. There is beauty in color and creation all around me. I have love and laughter and contentment. But it's all temporary.

[dem862]

Weeding of the gene pool has occured over hundreds of thousands of years. It isn't going to change in a generation or two. There have been many, many intelligent people throughout history, they just haven't reproduced. What we have left are decendants of the people who liked to f#ck. If you don't like to do that, your genes will be weeded out too.

[gardenofjade]

Have you looked on university campuses? That's where intelligent people hang. I agree, a couple of generations and probably a couple of nukes will weed out the pool.

[boobaa]

Oh, she is intelligent, very. Just a messed up person too.

I do have high standards, but I am not setting for less either.
My whole town is a campus. Yesterday I looked up the statistics, approx 3000 girls my age live in here. How many of them are single? How many of them are intelligent? How many of them are my type? Chances are quite slim.

[gardenofjade]

Back to the original post, you are the one saying that it's not moving forward. So that's really not up to a woman to fix, it's up to you... so what do you have that needs to improve?
And your last post seems to imply that you aren't going to settle with the current girlfriend. So... I'm missing something here.

[boobaa]

Well, I left her bechause she wasn't agreeing to commit. And I have some serious trust issues with her, she being kind of secretive and with very large social circle. I am more of a worker type and less of a communicator.
She is not my girlfriend, we are not together, we just had sex for the first time in 4 months. She is my ex. But damn, when we are together we kind of hit it off. Weird. I want to forget her, but I seem to not be capable. Feels like a really good friend if only there were no sexual tension, jelausy and falling.

[gardenofjade]

Yeah, so you fell in love. That's ok. You've made up your mind that you two are over. Now it's time to get back on your feet again, eh? Take some time to find the girl that's right for you. But she can't come along that journey, right!?!?!