Should I tell my bestfriend something I know about his gilfriend??

[Mark85]

I've been dating my bestfriends sister for a few months now and its been going really good. She went out to the bar one night with my buddies girlfriend about a year ago or so and buddies girlfriend ended up making out with some random guy. She never told her brother about it and isn't sure if his girlfriend told him about it or not. She has actually cheated on him before this. She told me not to say anything about it, but I feel really guilty that I know this and feel that he is my bestfriend and I should let him know about this. He usually tells me almost everything that is going on and has never said anything about this. Should I just leave this alone or is it my job as his bestfriend to let him know about this?

[Wakeup]

I've been dating my bestfriends sister for a few months now and its been going really good. She went out to the bar one night with my buddies girlfriend about a year ago or so and buddies girlfriend ended up making out with some random guy. She never told her brother about it and isn't sure if his girlfriend told him about it or not. She has actually cheated on him before this. She told me not to say anything about it, but I feel really guilty that I know this and feel that he is my bestfriend and I should let him know about this. He usually tells me almost everything that is going on and has never said anything about this. Should I just leave this alone or is it my job as his bestfriend to let him know about this?

If you tell him after your girlfriend told you in confidence, then you are breaking her trust and you run the chance of losing her over repeating something that is none of your business.

She's his sister and she's the one who witnessed whatever it is his gf did... maybe you should try to talk to her about telling him and that way you won't get smack from your gf for betraying a confidence.

[smackie9]

The messenger always gets killed....it quite possibly it will destroy relationships if you did tell and I mean between you and all involved. If the GF's actions didn't involve you then it's none of your business and it is his to find out about it on his own.

They always say "why didn't you tell me?" but in reality when you are the one that brings the bad news somehow you get blamed for it or you become a bad person because they don't believe you and that you are bad mouthing their GF. It's better to keep your mouth shut.

Plus you were never a witness so leave it. Second tell your GF to also mind her own business and stop gossiping about it.....so not mature.

[Red Apollo]

Bro code man, wouldn't you want to know if your girlfriend cheated on you? I had a friend who knew something like that about one of my ex-girlfriends, and he didn't tell me until after I found out. I lost major respect for him.

It makes it complicated though that your girlfriend told you in confidence. I agree with Wakeup, talk to your girlfriend about it. Alternatively, you could just leave it be and not tell him if you think you can live with it. I wouldn't tell him without talking to your girlfriend first though.

[smackie9]

I agree that he should be told, but by the person that actually witnessed it, not the one who heard about it.

[Mark85]

Ya, I would foresure want to be told, I hate that I know this and was told not to tell him.. you said right with the bro code.. I really think he needs to know and if he does know and has worked through it, thats great! I guess the best way to deal with this is to get my girlfriend to talk to him, she said she doesn't like talking to her brother about stuff like that but maybe she just has to step up and do it. If it was my brother or sister I would have told them right away.

[haxan]

I guess the best way to deal with this is to get my girlfriend to talk to him, she said she doesn't like talking to her brother about stuff like that but maybe she just has to step up and do it. If it was my brother or sister I would have told them right away.

Exactly. Everything YOU know is hearsay. She knows the facts, she should confront him.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Tell your girlfriend that it makes you wary of how trustworthy she is if she's willing to keep something like this from her brother. Act a little distant from your girlfriend and tell her that the situation is really upsetting you because you feel like you have a duty to tell him. Make her feel really guilty. She probably already does, which is why she told you in the first place.

[IndiReloaded]

Bro code man, wouldn't you want to know if your girlfriend cheated on you? I had a friend who knew something like that about one of my ex-girlfriends, and he didn't tell me until after I found out. I lost major respect for him.

I agree that he should be told, but by the person that actually witnessed it, not the one who heard about it.

Agree. If my sister or a trusted friend knew my partner cheated and didn't tell me I don't know I'd forgive either of them. Besides, she's his sister. Any upset he feels for her being the messenger will pass. You can do it together.

[iamminzy]

I would ask your girlfriend why she would want to keep this secret if she already knew about it. I don't think you should be the one to tell him but your girlfriend since they are siblings because they will always be siblings no matter how much one of the crosses the line because the relationship is established. I think the reason why she won't tell her brother because he doesn't want him to find out and doesn't want him to feel sad. it;s understandable. But you gotta tell your girlfriend that its best to tell the truth because how long do you think the relationship between her brother and gf will last? Who knows when they get married she might cheat on him again. honesty is always the best approach even if it hurts as long as you are being true to yourself. I think your gf needs to think about his future and not worried about hurting his gfeelings because you don't want to play fire against fire it makes it worse.. and not saying anything is just as bad as lying...

[Mark85]

I talked to my girlfriend and she said she didn't say anything to him because she felt guilty about it because it was just the 2 of them drinking together and she said she should have been taking better care of her. She is also really good friends with her, but I told her that none of that should matter and she has to tell him. I kind of don't think she is going to say anything to him. I'm trying to think of a way that I can get them to talk about it. If I told my buddy that he has to talk to his sister about something that his girlfriend did and it has nothing to do with me but he should talk to her. I think it is hard for my girlfriend to just start that conversation with him.. she doesn't want to wreck her relationship with her either because if they do end up staying together then they will both end of hating each other and doesn't want to have her family fighting....

[smackie9]

Well there you have it.....sometimes things are best left alone. I can see if she was having an affair but this thing happened over a year ago so really when you think about it....is it really worth all the fuss? I think you guys need to just mind your own business.