What to do about my friend

[pickler]

Ok I have a friend that I met couple years ago at my college. He has been nothing but a major pain in the ass now hat I think of it. Sure we had some good times playing pool with other people at my college but really he was always a drag. We would go clubbing and he would complain and be negative. So we stopped going clubbing as a group because one of us is clearly not a club person. He also doesnt have a car and would always use me to drop him home or to college. He never paid for gas. Recently I have tried to stop doing that but he would ask me for a ride out of no where and it's hard for me to deny a friend a favor. But I managed to avoid giving him rides today and he got a ride from his mom instead (a 22 year old guy)!! Anyway he is also somewhat annoying by making innocent racist jokes about my background. This has been going on for a year and it's getting old fast. He is also very competitive and I think hates that I can afford to have a nice car. So he has been bugging his mom for a car and his mom promised him a used Mercedes by spring, lol. Now I worked my ass off for my car and bought it myself which cost about $24k so far. Obviously makes me jealous that a dude with no job is gonna drive a nice car. But the thing that bugs me most is that he can't shut up abOut it. I can't really avoid him because he is in my program and most my classes. He is also in my group for one course and he is useless. He manages to pass a really hard test by copying a smartass and beat my score. He did not study. I'm wondering what I should do, I want him out of my life but that's not possible...please help! this guy is a source of stress in my life. He just text me and asked for a ride while I was writing this!

Thanks.

[Petit Papillon]

I tell you something. Maybe it was hard to shake off such person at high school, but university should be different. You're a grown up person and it's you who chose your company. If you don't like the guy just stop talking to him. I have such girls in my classes on uni too, I've let it happen till the moment when I have screwed my own exams trying to help them learn .
You have to start to be a bit egoistic. Your "friend" will not give you food or home after studies. He has better notes by cheating now? Life will verify this. In the end, no one will look at your score, but at what you have in your head. He will probably have a stupid smile on his face.Life is too short to be around people you don't like. Realize that and you will know what to do.

[pickler]

well today i made my first move and ignored his calls. During class he asked to go to some sushi place with couple of his friends and i flat out declined. It's not just that i hate his guts, it's the fact that i have to waste gas going all the way there and back to school. I did feel like an asshole though, i'm not sure why. But hopefully i will continue to ignore him and decline doing him any favors. The only issue is that he is almost in all my class next term. One thing that annoys me the most about him is his constant calls to ask for a ride, he doesn't give up and just keeps on calling every freaking day.

[Petit Papillon]

Well than ask him to share the gas expenses? You'll see how quick he'll stop to call you to ask for a drive. You have to learn how to be assertive a bit . Do you want to be his bitch for the rest of the university ?
You have to learn how to erase assholes from your life, it will help you later in your professional life . People use people like you, they know that you will always agree because you're too nice to say "no". It's not going to help you, instead, you will always feel like that loser . It's not that you shouldn't help other at all, it's that when you notice that they use you, it's when you should cut the string.

[pickler]

i know this thread is old but i have an update. this friend recently bought a car, well his mom bought him a car. you see even though he is 21 he is pretty spoiled and lives with his mom. his mom is not rich at all rather a middle class, she is a sales person. She bought him a brand new benz. the mom herself drives a 10 year old truck. since she bought this, he is constantly texting and calling me and saying that he wants to show me his new car. im a car buff and work on a lot of performance cars at my shop. but i hate his guts, im sure if i ask him to drive me somewhere he would just simply refuse without question even though i have driven him around for the past couple years (which i stopped since i made this thread). At first i though he is thinking of me as a friend for showing me his car but at the same time im sure he does not care about my opinion or observations on his vehicle. should i agree to see his car or just forget him?

[IndiReloaded]

Why do you hate this guy so much? What is it he has actually done *to you*? Sure the cheating thing makes him an asshole. And the car thing makes him spoiled (esp. since it sounds like his parents are divorced and he's using him mom) and a braggart. But you will encounter guys like this (and worse) in your life. Don't waste your energy hating on this guy, I guarantee he isn't spending 2 neurons thinking about you. Karma IS, pickler. He'll pay for the things he does, tho you may not ever find out exactly how. But that's his path. You surely have enough shit in your own backyard to shovel?

Surround yourself with people who you admire. Makes the shit-shoveling we all do a lot easier.

[pickler]

i dont hate him if i did i would not have posted here for advice. i feel bad for turning him down to show off his car. feel like nervous and guilty sice i said im busy and cant. my gf once told me to just ignore him and that he is nothing but trouble. dont know what to do...he has been my companion for two years although he is very rude and unprofessional. he has totally different likes, but not like im marrying him lol. but i certainly would nor like to lose him either. i did not surround my self with morons, just that they surround themselves with ppl like me. he was a friend of a best friend once and thats how we met.

[IndiReloaded]

but i hate his guts, im sure if i ask him to drive me somewhere he would just simply refuse without question

i dont hate him if i did i would not have posted here for advice.

You said you hated him. See above. You've been told to ditch him, your GF says ignore him. Sounds like you really want to keep him around so you can complain about him. People often do this when they want to avoid dealing w/their own issues. Shrug.

[Bo]

It's true what indie said, grow some ballsies and tell the guy to **** off

[Bo]

The question to ask is what do you really have to lose?