Sex on the first date?

[Maple1714]

As a man, does having sex with a women on the first date ruin any chance of a lasting relationship? Do you inevitable see this women as just a sexual object and nothing else? Curious as to how men REALLY feel about sex on the first date.

I know a few couples who had sex right away and 2 of them got married....

[Cerby]

It leaves a little less to wait for in the coming weeks, but honestly I don't think it changes anything from most men's perspectives.

[surfhb]

I had sex with a girl on a first date and she turned out to be the only one I had sex with for the next 14 years.

[haxan]

It's totally irrelevant. Having sex on a first date doesn't change the odds in any fashion.

You always see a woman for everything she brings to the table, not just sex. Once in a while you run across a woman, that the only thing she brings to the table is sex, so what else is there to see her for?

[Maple1714]

Great responses...I think it doesn't really matter either. If something more is there then it's there. Sure, waiting builds tension.

[Boisdevie]

Sure, waiting builds tension.

Yeah but wait too long and it can lead to boredom and apathy.

[cheekxs]

and did their marriage survive?

cause many people dont even know what marriage is!

[loveagain]

I did, not just on a first date but on a blind date, and ended up married to her for 17 years (and 2 children. the first did not arrive until 7 years after that first date, so we didn't get married for that reason, we dated over 3 years first) Having sex on the first date didn't end our marriage, but it came up as an issue at times, particularly in counseling right before we separated.

[J.R.Jefferis]

No way it should happen on the first date...this is way too soon if you want to have a long-term relationship.

JR

[IndiReloaded]

It's totally irrelevant. Having sex on a first date doesn't change the odds in any fashion.

I wouldn't say irrelevant. Any man or woman who has sex with a stranger on a first date is telling you something about their priorities (or lack of). Sex, for one.

[haxan]

I wouldn't say irrelevant. Any man or woman who has sex with a stranger on a first date is telling you something about their priorities (or lack of). Sex, for one.

In most cases, you've seen each other and talked to some degree (unless a blind date). When I dated, I pretty much knew in about 10 minutes if I'd see them again or not. If there was a nice chemistry and connection, a strong physical attraction, what's the difference? It was already past a one time thing (meaning we both knew we wanted to and would see each other again, usually talking about it).

1st date, 3rd; one week, 2 weeks, I never placed any significance on it. To me, if we end up in bed after 2 weeks, or the first weekend, it was more of an attraction/comfort/chemistry thing, not a priority.

I guess I ~knew~ what my intentions were, and am fortunate to have the ability to read people on the inside incredibly well. Most people probably aren't very intuitive, so can be drawn in to the wrong person, for the wrong reasons. I can only say from my perspective as a man, if we by chance ended up spending the weekend together, it would be much more of a good thing for the long term than not.

I realize that's probably in the minority and I probably didn't explain it that well :-P

[iamaninnocentma]

Yeah but wait too long and it can lead to boredom and apathy.

Reading your posts leads to boredom and apathy.

Ofc its not cool to give your flower to a man on a first date. A real man will never respect you after this. Some women even wait until they are married. This is the girl i am looking for.

If you pump a man after 1 date, then he just thinks that you pump everyone that you have a date with. Therefore, he will never respect you and probably leave after 4 or 5 more pumpings. Do woman really not know these things? The replies from the men in this thread are stupid and lies.

[iamaninnocentma]

In most cases, you've seen each other and talked to some degree (unless a blind date). When I dated, I pretty much knew in about 10 minutes if I'd see them again or not. If there was a nice chemistry and connection, a strong physical attraction, what's the difference? It was already past a one time thing (meaning we both knew we wanted to and would see each other again, usually talking about it).

1st date, 3rd; one week, 2 weeks, I never placed any significance on it. To me, if we end up in bed after 2 weeks, or the first weekend, it was more of an attraction/comfort/chemistry thing, not a priority.

I guess I ~knew~ what my intentions were, and am fortunate to have the ability to read people on the inside incredibly well. Most people probably aren't very intuitive, so can be drawn in to the wrong person, for the wrong reasons. I can only say from my perspective as a man, if we by chance ended up spending the weekend together, it would be much more of a good thing for the long term than not.

I realize that's probably in the minority and I probably didn't explain it that well :-P

Its amazing how you have took on Cams personality.

"most people arnt very intuitive" but ofc you are.

Sickening

[Sixpacj]

Reading your posts leads to boredom and apathy.

Ofc its not cool to give your flower to a man on a first date. A real man will never respect you after this. Some women even wait until they are married. This is the girl i am looking for.

If you pump a man after 1 date, then he just thinks that you pump everyone that you have a date with. Therefore, he will never respect you and probably leave after 4 or 5 more pumpings. Do woman really not know these things? The replies from the men in this thread are stupid and lies.

You are being a bit rude here. Most men simply disagree with you, don't mean their replies are "stupid and lies".

I'd concur it doesn't really matter. Most of my long-term relationships started with sex very early on...

BTW, to my taste, you have some "special" view of virginity ("flower")...

[haxan]

Its amazing how you have took on Cams personality.

"most people arnt very intuitive" but ofc you are.

Sickening

I don't remember Cam saying that. Maybe he said he can read his ex and his girlfriends well? Yes, most people aren't very intuitive outside of their loved ones.

You make it sound like it's an attribute that's used to manipulate women, or 'birds' as you like to say, into bed, or to take advantage of them. It's something that's a strength in dealing with people across the board, men and women, personally and professionally. I'm glad, and fortunate that I have it, but there's other attributes I'd prefer, but I have the cards I was dealt.

You seem to want to think that no one on here could possibly have strengths, positives in their life. They're just here to piss and moan. Get over it, junior.