Help me understand this FB message from my ex?

[NCgirl]

Back story: I dated a guy a few years ago that I truly thought was my soul mate. If falling in love at first sight is real, then that's what happened. From the moment I met him I was head over heels. Call it love, call it lust, whatever it was, I loved everything about it! We actually lost our virginity to each other and one night when he was drunk (we were in college at the time) he called me and went on and on about how he wished we had met later on in life because he was scared of how much he cared about me and how he thought I was perfect for him and that if we met later then he would be able to settle down... anyhow, a couple months later we broke up. I still think about him every single day, sometimes just a random thought but sometimes I have these daydreams where we finally get back together again and end up getting married. For some reason, I still feel like he is the one for me.

I have randomly seen him throughout the years and every time we talk it's like we never stopped. We pick up right where we left off and every thing feels so natural. I still get butterflies when I see him. However, after the last time I saw him at a bar, he talked to my friends (whom he doesn't even know) and blatantly avoided speaking to me. Shortly thereafter I messaged him, thanks to liquid courage, and asked him why he didn't care about me anymore. Here is his response.

"It's not that I don't like you. It's just a selfish thing that its easier for me to act you like don't exist than to deal with the fact that I actually might care. It's part of the reason I can't even be friends with [edited] who was my first friend here and whom I miss more than anyone bar none. If I act like that part of me doesn't even exist I don't have to worry about it. It's not you, I'm just incapable of being anything you remotely want me to be so I stop it before I can disappoint anyone. That's it and that's all."

*The friend he is speaking of was a mutual friend who introduced the two of us. Her and I don't speak much anymore, we just grew apart over the last few years.

If anyone could help me understand what he means by this, I would appreciate it. Go ahead and break it on down for me lol I have my own opinion but it'd be nice to hear someone else's. Is he saying he doesn't want to be my friend because he can't be "just" my friend, or what?

[cheekxs]

Let me say it this way, i think only 1 % or less of people that break up and get back after a couple of years make it for real after that cause they may be for each other.

The others are just rubbish!the reason they get back is just for the sex, or they couldn't find some one else to put up with their shit, or
for financial reason or feeling lonely. and stuff.

I think you are running with open arms to get hit again with a broken heart.
he is a ex of yours for a reason. and i think you now heis no good for you but you
still want to live in fairytale. and he is just talking shit to keep your mind busy wondering.

I dont like drama and bullshit so i would understand out of that that he is not interested and shore not for serious relationships.



Some girls gets hurt suddenly, and some just bag to be hurt by a men that they know is not good for them.
And you better be smarter then this. cause a men often know very good what he is doing.and plans it well.

and if a girl keep running after them some may use her and leave!

[cheekxs]

and he even talk about you in that massage. ahahhahahaha,

but about another that he miss more then anyone.
hahahhhahah, girl you need more then self esteem! for real!

And clearly enough he is warning you very clearly that you may get hurt very bad, so he
protect you by not dealing with you. and he is telling you indirectly to stay away. dont keep
acting that desperate toward him.he have noting to offer no one right now so he keep distance.


but i guess you are to desperate to be love or something. sad.

[smackie9]

He is giving you the kiss off, the adios amigos. He was letting you down easy, he is not interested in being with you. He knows you are in love with him, and he knows he can't be a part of it, because he doesn't feel the same way. That stuff about meeting you later in life....well he was saying that what you represent someone who is marriage material, not the person he wants to marry....he was trying to put it nicely. That's why it ended in the first place....he wasn't in love with you.....he just didn't have the heart to tell you knowing how you felt.

[cheekxs]

hahhahahaha, its ADIOS AMIGOS! audio is for music hahahahahhahahahhahahah

[smackie9]

Ya my spelling goes down hill when it's cocktail hour since 1:30 in da afternoon lol. There it's fixed, my spell checker wouldn't have caught that one. I have an excuse, there is no Mexican culture in Canada....just Chinese and Hindu where I live.....right Cerby?

[Busted Ego]

The saying is true that "the one that cares the less about the other has the power" he likes the sex and comfort of te past but doesn't want a future. Just the present. Sorry,