big problem, do I get away from her? need help from any mature women :/

**xps570** · 24-09-12, 12:48 AM

Hello, first time poster here. I'm a 20 year old male that keeps himself very busy with school, internship, and part time job. My problem is THIS. I met a girl who I really liked and she seemed awesome. We had sexual intercourse and the condom broke. Later I find out that she had chlamydia. She got tested on tuesday and decided to not tell me until last night when we had a fight (which I think is really rude and ridiculous of her). I've never had anything and I am always so careful, to the point where I go straight to the bathroom and wash up all the time (a little over dramatic but an STD is my biggest fear). I went to the hospital and was in the emergency room until 4 AM because I was so scared I just wanted to get cured. She tells me she didn't know and never had sex without a condom but clearly she was lying. I just need to ask someone that I don't know if its a good idea to just stop talking to her. She's the type of girl who's just starting to get their stuff together in life and I'm way passed that point. It's just scary to know that I got lied to about that especially since I never thought that could happen to me because I don't go around sleeping with everything. I'm a relationship kind of guy not a man who**. Can I get some advice? :/

**IndiReloaded** · 24-09-12, 01:03 AM

She's a lying skank. Yes, stop talking to her. I'm sorry this happened to you. The chances are small you have been infected, but the medicos will give you antibiotics and hopefully you will be okay. I'm sure you've already been told, but know the signs. There are others here who know much more than I do about this, but meantime, here is a reputable source of info.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0002321/

**xps570** · 24-09-12, 01:26 AM

Yeah I think the best thing is to stop talking to her. I already got the medication (1 shot and 4 pills) when I was in the emergency room for it last night. They told me that I had no symptoms and I was fine but I told them just give me the medicine because I'm not taking the chance, almost like the Dr.s were trying to talk me out of it because nothing was wrong with me. It just bugs me out because when the condom broke I stopped right away because I felt it and she legit FREAKED OUT. saying "oh my god I never did it without a condom I'm so scared" actually crying. Obviously she was lying which means HBO should really hire her because it was the best performance I have ever seen in my life.

**smackie9** · 24-09-12, 01:34 AM

BTW you can get Chlamydia through oral, so it's possible she wasn't lying to you.

To add sometimes there are no symptoms, and it gets left untreated, so she could have got in contact with it months ago.

**IndiReloaded** · 24-09-12, 01:42 AM

True. Even if she wasn't lying, the way she told you was horrible. How long have you been seeing her?

**smackie9** · 24-09-12, 01:55 AM

You go by your gut feeling. If what happen has really made you think differently of her then don't bother with her anymore. Just remember, we all know sex is risky even with the use of condoms....they don't protect you from genital warts, or crabs just to name a few. Maybe you need to spend more time getting to know someone before hoping into the sac. Have more open honest talks about sex, past partners and protection with them first. Even with all the precautions taken, there will always be risks.

**smackie9** · 24-09-12, 02:01 AM

To add she is young, was probably really scared like you (I know it's no excuse for sure) and was so embarrassed, ashamed by it, and feared that you would think of her as a slut or something. I'm sure she saw her mistake, but I don't blame you for being upset about it. Hopefully you both have learned something from this....thank god that's all that happened, it could have been way worse.

**InYourFACE** · 24-09-12, 02:06 AM

You sound t me mature for a 20 years old.

I like that. And i hope you really are.

But i wonder if you did not notice that the condom broke in middle of the action?
And choose to finish it?
And this is why you need to safe sex for marriage and not for every girlfriend you have.

Cause often when people sleep with every girl they meet and have relationship with
they dont take time to build such a trust so the other can open up to them about
things like "i have herpes or chlamydia.

Maybe this is a hard lesson for you to learn
And dont put your dick everywhere you got horny.

And first thing would be go to the doctor and you did it.
and next thing is learn from your mistakes and dont be like her, tell the person you will have sex with if you are infected also

**xps570** · 24-09-12, 03:05 AM

Everyone thank you so much for your responces, I just didn't know where else to go for something like this because I feel like the biggest dirt bag right now. Yes I did know the condom broke and I pulled out right away. I'm not even 100 percent sure I had it but when she told me it was 2 AM and I got in my car, drove to the hospital, and got treated for it. Everyones saying that maybe she was scared, but she flat out told me it was because we were in a fight and she decided not to tell me because she didn't think I "cared" about her. I feel like this is going to change my life forever and it sucks. Also I def. do not like rushing into the bed right away but it seems like all the girls my age, well thats all they do. Than I try to go for older women around 25 and they tell me I'm to young so basically I'm screwed. I don't party, never did drugs, BARELY drink, I'm just focused on school and my internship and getting things done and its almost like it screws me over. It's just a shame that I can't actually find a NICE girl for once. Guess I'm going to lay off the dating scene because the only thing that ever happens is I get cheated on, lied to, or well....now this. I'm just happy I'm okay, walked into the Dr. and they didn't even bother testing me because I told them what happened so they just gave me the antibiotics. I'm going to go to MY Dr. this week and get tested for everything just to be sure. I was just tested a couple months ago for my yearly check up but I just want to do it again just to make sure.

**smackie9** · 24-09-12, 03:26 AM

Just to let you know the skin tissue in a vagina is more porous than the skin on a penis, in fact the virus has to get into the urethra or a cut in the skin or the foreskin if uncircumcised...that's why women get infected easier. That's why the doctor wasn't worried about it.

And that's BS about older women. It has nothing to do with your age, but has a lot to do with your financial status.....you are still in school.

**xps570** · 24-09-12, 03:33 AM

Has a lot to do with my financial status? lol. I could say so many things about that comment you made but I'll keep it to myself. My financial status is JUST fine trust me. If a girl wants me for money, that sucks for her because I don't date gold diggers

And yes it does have a lot to do with age and maturity. Basically what your saying is you can't have a solid relationship without having a lot of money, which is 2,000% wrong.

**smackie9** · 24-09-12, 03:59 AM

No no I'm not talking about gold diggers. You have to remember women at that age are looking for husbands not BFs. It is female nature at that age to find a man that is stable financially, has a career that is ready for marriage. You are at a different time line in your life....you are busy with school and have different priorities....you just want a nice GF, they want a husband to have babies with. F uckin get over it dude....I didn't say you were broke ass poor loser.

**smackie9** · 24-09-12, 04:01 AM

I am living proof, I started dating my husband when I was 26, when he was 20.

**xps570** · 24-09-12, 04:53 AM

Lol why did you get so mad in that last message? Jeeze lol. Everyone else thank you for the help

**IndiReloaded** · 24-09-12, 05:40 AM

Its a scary thing to go through, I'm sorry. But don't let this one experience harden you against all women. There are gems out there, but you have to sift through a lot of rocks to find them. Helps if you look where you are more likely to find gems, of course.

You'll be fine kiddo (you are young enough to be my son).

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