does he like me?

[Nicky88]

hi, sorry this is going to be a huge message as it spans a 10 year friendship lol
I have like my best friends older brother since ive known him, don't worry im not mentally obsessed I have been in long term relationships with ppl i have loved and he has had gfs aswell. ive known him since i was 12 there's a 2year age gap, im now 23.
We were kinda in touch over the years but only through his sister as pple grow up go to uni or get jobs and move but weve always been mates.
I just spent the last year in Australia and had a bf their for a year we broke up 3 months ago at around the same time he broke up with his gf of 2 years (she was into drugs) it was just a random coincidence no reading into that on my behalf.

he started posting on my fb wall while i was flying home, we have a mean sort of flirting thing as weve known each other since we were kids. then we started talking on chat a little bit...and then a lot but hes quite social i wasn't reading into things we did flirt but we were both aware we were doing it and it was ok and harmless. i went to see his sister at her brothers house she has 3 older brothers hes the youngest of them, we both slept on separate sofas in the lounge, nothing happened i wasn't expecting it to, he noticed i had lost weight, 3 stone in total and told his mum he thinks im cool now (not the little sisters annoying friend i think he meant lol)

his sister was ill away from her family a few weeks ago and stayed all day by her side in the hospital, shes much better now but as a kind of reward her mum offered for us to go to their holiday home in spain for 2 weeks. we flirt when we talk and we keep eye contact i do really care about his opinions and views,we read the same books and the mean flirting didn't really work anymore as it was verging onto real flirting. we were getting ready for a night out and my friend had gone out to get some drinks and i needed help zipping up my dress...mean i know, he did and said he like my dress and that i smelled good and me been myself said well yes i don't shower in shit, it was joky but it started a weird tension and the staring thing. we went out his sister my friend went to bed and we stayed up watch a film and drank a beer or more he kept saying we should go swimming, about an hour later i agreed. we went for a swim and he said something mean joky and i went to puch him like i do somtimes and he kissed me a lot, the oddest thing was that i was amazing i wasn't expecting that and i don't think he was either, we didn't do anything else we went inside had one last kiss and i said he was a 9 on kissing he said i was gona give you a 9 aswell, he kissed my forehead and we went to sleep. we didn't speak about it the next day or the next. its unspoken really. if someone say something that can be related to it we both look guilty and laugh. we hang out as were both nocturnal i gave him a hug before i went to sleep last night and it was very weird. i sent him a text when i got into bed saying:

'that was wierd...we made it wierd, last ever refernce to late night pool is now, not even a chuckle at a misguided comment should be made..or it might get even odder :/ still a 9 though well done.'

he replied 'its fine. thanks for the 9 tho. same goes. Yea, it was probably the worst idea ever. lol maybe leave it as an unspoken stolen night in a freezing pool. hope youre ok. x'

I ended on 'you can take the blame for the idea lol, agreed not the worst idea that was nuclear reaction but were close, im good i am an adult, you have confused the shit out of me mr..well done lol unspoken night it is '

this is the day after its been odd weve kind of stayed away from each other we still chat and there's a little flirting but i think he really regrets what we did, be brutally honest was he bored and he doesn't like me anything more than a friend....i have no clue i cant read him ive never known him on this level we were nonsexual before now there's tension and i think weve ruined our friendship, and i feel like the 14 year old who like her friends brother again...im not in 23 travel the world and go to university and lost weight had her heart broken by other guys but i might aswell be 14 again hes turned me into a nervous wreck lol. any help would be appreciated

[Boisdevie]

Sorry, I have a life to lead. Can you make it shorter as many of us have the attention span of ....................