Hey! First of all I want to say thanks to anyone who responds. I don't really have anyone that I can sit down and have an honest conversation with about my problem...
OK, so I met this girl about two years ago. We're both in our early 30's and share pretty much all the same friends. We instantly hit it off and have since become really good friends over the years. At first I fought my feelings but eventually gave in and started falling or her. However, she's always had a boyfriend. During the window between her last two relationships I did ask her out on a date and she told me she didn't know and couldn't answer. So I never really got a yes or no. Plus I believe she was just starting a new relationship when I asked.
Now here's the confusing stuff. She recently open ed up to me about how her ex-boyfriend pretty much hated me and was jealous of me. Why? Because all she did was talk about me to him and hang out with me. There was a lot of "be quiet, he's calling and I have to answer" moments. Now to top it all off she also just told me about how she was on vacation with her new boyfriend and again did nothing but talk about me. She mentioned both of these facts kind of on the sly but seemed shy about getting into it.
It's really confusing because we're so close it's like dating without the intimacy. I mean, after I asked her out I figured she would distance herself from me but she didn't. I've shared beds with her since. She knows exactly how I feel about her but she's not shying away from it. I don't know any girl who would continue to hang out with someone they know has feelings for them.
I've been pretty good at just being the friend. Sometimes it gets really hard to deal with but at the end of the day we are awesome friends. I guess my questions are... Is she hiding deeper feelings for me? Should I just forget it and stay friends? Should I express my feelings again some way? Ive never felt like this toward anyone in my life. I've never been this confused. I feel like a 15 yr old!
Any thought?? Thanks!!