so ive been out on a date with this girl, we kissed and it was good. unfortunately i had to leave home for a week and think about moving. so we talked on facebook, she responded to my message with a really emotional long message, but left a question i have posed about how she actually sees everything unanswered. so i think about sending of this letter expressing my emotions, do u think this is too emotionally needy, or am i better of just describing the truth? thanks a lot
the letter:
so u make me feel very insecure at the moment. im generally very insecure right now, cause i have no clue whether i will stay in spain or in england. spain feels like giving up the personal development of the last years. every experience, every conversation i had does not make sense in spanish, people are different there, i am afraid of going back to myself two years ago in spain. and england feels like giving up home. my language, everything that is familiar, and stable. and i dont want to lose neither of two things, and i have no clue which i can make work for me more easily. it makes me so worried. and it makes me feel insecure that i shared a lot in my first long message yesterday, but that i couldnt see in ur answer u read the end of it. it feels somewhat powerless sharing a lot and not getting a reaction. and in some way this means i cant entirely care for people, because it means i cant just leave my ego entirely away, like i write this because it feels good writing it down, but i have no clue whether it is the most caring thing to do. so again i feel like i have to do something, cause i like change so much. and im aware that all i wrote today and yesterday was probably weird, inappropriate cause i dont really know u, idk, and i understand if u think its annoying or something. but i would like to get an answer. to what i wrote in my first long message. i often create those „decision“ situations with people i want to get close to because i feel if i want to share it starts making me vulnerable and i want to create a situation with two outcomes i can both deal with, quick closeness or quick end. so dont get this the wrong way, but i want an answer by today. i want to skype by today. and if u dont want to, i really hope that u take the time to be a honest, and i will leave u alone.