Not sure why I feel this way!

[SarahLou87]

I don't even know why I keep feeling the way I do. I will start off by giving you a little bit of history before I tell you the problem maybe someone can shed some light for me.

I was with my ex for 3 years and we had a really bad relationship, he was texting and meeting his ex's behind my back the whole time we were together (I didn't find this out until after we broke up). We always fought no matter what it was over. Anyway we broke up and I got with my current partner and we have been together for 4 years. He has been amazing never given me anything to doubt him over, we have our disagreements like all couples do but we have only ever argued properly about 5 times since being together.

Anyway the issue! He has been talking to this friend of his who is female for roughly 4 years too, she's a really nice lass and I have spoken to her a few times too. Because of bad experiences with an ex boyfriend of hers she is now a lesbian. Anyway my boyfriend is going to meet her for the first time today, and even though deep down I know for a fact that there is nothing wrong with this, and that nothing would ever happen between them I still can't get rid of this feeling that I hate that fact that he is going to meet her.

I suffer really bad with Depression, Anxiety, which in turn has left me with no confidence at all about myself or what I am worth. I just don't want to seem like a obsessive girlfriend so I say nothing to him about how I feel but last night when he told me he was going to meet her I went to bed without telling him and ignored him completely. And still this morning I can't bring myself to act 'normal' around him.

I just don't know how to overcome this stupid emotions/feelings. Any advice would be great.

Thank You in advance.

Sarah x

[Saya]

Why can't you go with him and meet up with her?

[SarahLou87]

I did ask him if I could meet her and he agreed but only after the first time he has met her, plus someone has to take the little one to nursery at 12.30 and he's meeting her for 1. I know I'm over reacting and it's stupid but I just can't seem to shift this feeling.

[Saya]

I wonder why he won't let you meet her when he is going to meet her for the first time.
Oh and this friend is probably not lesbian, but she could be bisexual....
Considering you have depression and anxiety...this isn't healthy for you..so if you have problem about this, you should let your bf know and perhaps he may want to change few things around and may want you to come with him when he meet his friend.

[SarahLou87]

I don't want to push him too much, I don't want to come across as a obsessive girlfriend which is what it is going to seem like if I tell him I want to go with him today.

I'm making myself ill over it, but I know I have to deal with it. I know I have to stop feeling this way because he has never given me reason to doubt him.

I just wish I could 'get over' these horrible feelings.

[Saya]

Just try to stay positive.
Make yourself busy by doing something so the time will pass by quickly.
You trust him so it is going to be ok.
You have spoken to her before, you know her. and she knows that you two are in a committed relationship and that you exist.