Why am I hurt, even if it didn't go far?

[cleancoupe]

I met this girl at work back in September, and from that moment I was attracted. We seemed to click well because we were always smiling at each other and we're always working together. I added her on facebook and we chatted for a while. One day there was a staff meeting and after it was finished we talked for a couple minutes and asked her how she was getting home. she said she was walking and I offered her a ride. She was very shy but said yes. I told her I wanted to get to know her better and she said the same thing. We messaged each other throughout the week (2 days out of the week for about 3 hours) because I only see her on Saturdays which is when we have the same shifts. Anyway, after only seeing each other 3 times at work, we went out. I’m not too sure how it went because there was awkward silences at moments and sometimes we didn’t really know what to say to each other. I felt like I screwed up but i didn’t say anything. I dropped her off and 15 minutes later she thanked me for taking her out. I started falling for this girl, to the point where she was constantly in my mind. I would go to sleep thinking of her, and she would be the very first person on my mind.
Last week we texted and she was very flirty and I loved it because it gave me a hint that she likes me. I only see her on the weekends. Shes in high school right now and I’m working. We are only 2 years apart from each other. So this week that just passed by I saw her. We went on a walk and talked. It didn’t seem like we had a connection whatsoever but I like her a lot. I was expecting a text from her but I didn’t. we didn’t text for the next 3 days and at work things were ok. We smiled and flirted very very little. I feel like something has changed. She usually texts me after work but she didn’t yesterday and she hasn’t today.
Im really confused because I fell really hard for this girl and I wanted to take her out a lot more and make her life a little bit more exciting as right now its not the greatest. Shes very beautiful and shes everything I look for in a women.
What could I have done wrong for her to be pulling apart? Is she waiting for me to text her ahs I never do? Its always her?
Should I ask her why is she so distant from me? I don’t want to annoy her.
Or should I text her normally saying hey what you up to?
Please help me. Ive been really upset the past week because of this and I cant get this out of my mind. Why hasn’t she texted me?

[cleancoupe]

edit: fixed it

[nikipooh84]

wow...that was a lot to take in....lol I thought you had more replies than me and I was just gonna go on to the next thread thinking this one was already solved....lol..

here's what i think.... remember, only my opinion....
it is understandable that you want this new girl's attention. she replaced the thrill that was missing with your first girlfriend. she's everything you wished cud work with the first. So its natural to feel such strong feelings for a new person. Ive been there, but before I tell you anything, I believe that what you have to do first is learn how to be content in being single. Its the hardest thing to do when youre so vulnerable. but the only way you'll ever find peace and true love in life is if you respect yourself fully enuf to trust that you will find exactly what youre looking for. It may not come now, it may not come til 10-20 years from now. Its a harsh reality I know, but give yourself time on relationships....date a couple of people....or if you dont have many friends, hell...go to a movie by yourself or with family. whatever you do, just keep yourself active. There will be a lot of lonely nights and crying. But if you allow yourself to keep busy you'll find yourself so busy that your life is now very social...and you can enjoy the dating scene..

As far as this girl...
If she is as shy as you say, she may not know how to tell you that she wants to pursue you. Or that she wants a relationship or friendship at that matter...she may not be ready. For this same reason, she wasnt in love with a man that loved her....because she may not have had those same feelings, and he may have moved too fast for her. At this point, she may just like your company. If she's flirting with you as u say...it sounds that she wants to keep your interest and may be playing hard to get because its entertaining to her. I know that was kinda harsh but sometimes its true. On a better note tho, I would hope that she probably just appreciates your company...and a lil flirting here and there, because it takes her mind off of her guy....as it takes your mind off of your ex. I believe that continuing to be 'special' friends with her is good for now. A girl wants to feel special, needed, wanted...invite her out, or send a simple just thinking about you text. If she just totally ignores than you know she may not feel a connection. and you'll be ok...

[cleancoupe]

thank you for your reply.

the thing is I dont plan on making her mine, just yet. I like how things were going but i feel like i did something wrong because she always texts me and now she hasnt for 5 days.
should i text her and ask her whats wrong? why is she being so distant from me? i have so many things i want to explain here but they all build up and i start writing but they dont make sense.

[nikipooh84]

i understand.

i just dont want you to get caught up in worrying that things may not go as planned. Cuz they just may not...whether you want her to be with you or not...its her decision and you may end up on the losing end. Just prepare yourself for the what ifs.

have you tried to text her? gotten no response? or are you used to her textin and contacting you?

I dont think u should ask her whats wrong...but more of thinking about u...how u been, that sort of thing. Her response will let you know whats up. She'll either be excited to hear from you, or not interested at all.

Its hard not to tell you to express your feelings to her if you dont plan on being with her... at this point you have to play it like friends then. Just like you would check up on a friend, do that with her... u cant expect someone to do things if they dont look at you more than a friend. youre not priority, so she may not feel she is obligated to check with you much.

You never know...she cud just be dating other people. there are no commitments here. I dont think there is anything wrong with catchin up with her tho...but dont make it too friendly...lol see where it leads you.

[cleancoupe]

Yea I think I'm just going to see where things go. I will be texting her later on this week to see how she's
Doing.
Thank you so much for your opinion. I really appreciate it.