Am I being too controlling?

[lomfs24]

I have a few concerns with my GF. We have been seeing each other for a while now. When we started seeing each other I knew that she had a lot of guy friends. She said that they were easier to deal with than friends that were girls. Less drama etc... This didn't really bother me at first. I figured that as she told them that she was taken a lot of the guy friends would drift off realizing that they weren't in the running, so to speak. And my prediction was right. Most of them have drifted off. However, there are a couple that are still hanging around. I told her that I was OK with her having guy friends and didn't want to be the controlling type that said she couldn't have friends. I truly don't think that there is anything going on with them. She will text them and ask for advise, how their day is etc... and they all know that we are together. But there are times I can't help but wonder what's being said in texts. A while ago we were traveling together in the car for 3 hours and I tried to engage her in conversation and she didn't seem like she really wanted to talk, yet was texting one of her "friends". Recently she was in a goofy argument with one of them as to whether or not their friendship was one sided or not. I was wanting to talk to her about some stuff about our up coming wedding. Instead she was texting pages upon pages of the word yes, while he was texting the same thing of the word no. Then she texted him good night, rolled over and went to sleep. The next morning, minutes after getting up she started in on him again. When I confront her about these things she will show me the text messages and there truly is nothing wrong with the text messages.

So my concerns are; 1) Why would she text conversation to another guy with me in the car and yet not engage in conversation with me. Her excuse was that her last relationship even if they traveled together they didn't visit and she would do her own thing. And that their two schedules rarely meet where they can talk.

2) Should I be concerned that she is texting another guy, benign though it is, clear up until the time she goes to sleep and then the moment she gets up the next morning? Especially when both times were times I wanted to talk about things in our relationship.

Am I being too paranoid and controlling? Is this behavior something I should be concerned about? Something I should put a stop to? I have friends that are women as well. But our texts are a couple texts here and there exchanging important information and they are short concise and to the point most of the time not exceeding 5 messages each way and almost never more than 10 each way. They certainly are not hours longs, days long and they are not the first thing on my mind when I wake up in the morning.

I truly love this girl, she is the best thing that has happened to me. Do I need to put a stop to this endless texting other guys, or do I need help getting over my own insecurities?

[lomfs24]

PS. I am new to all this. I am forty years old and divorced. When I went through this 16 years ago I didn't have to deal with text messages, facebook, social networking etc... You said you loved your girl, she was with you all the time and that's all you had to worry about. I wish it was still that easy. I'm just trying to work through this world we live in now.