im back again...with a new situation .. **sigh**

[lost_lad]

so... a month or so ago i posted a thread about how confused this girl made me.. we where together for 5 years and it ended... after 3 gruelling months we finally went to a hotel and were back together...well kind of... the thing is she is worried about telling her parents because after all our arguments she used to go back and tell tales...which we are all guilty of) but it has made them not like me...but they never heard of all the good times we had..i dont wanna lose her because of her parents... and its killing me...confused all over again HELP!!!!

[basilandthyme]

Before you worry about the parents, tell us what changes you've put in place to stop all these terrible arguments from happening again. There's no sense in starting again unless you've addressed the underlying causes to the problems.

That being said, you do know that her parents are very justified in their position, don't you? They are not to blame if things go pearshaped.

[lost_lad]

i wasnt showing much interest in the relationship in the last few months of it...but in the past 3 weeks that we have been back together, i have made huge changes, and got myself back workin after being off sick for just over a year...i understand to a point that they will be annoyed that we are getting back together..but i think it is wrong if they were to fall out with her over this, at the end of the day she is twenty-four years old, and we have a child together, and we love eachother, and me and my partner have both agreed that her parents are the biggest factor...i understand also that she does not want to upset them, but as i have said to her, they will basically have to like it or lump it (british phrase haha) they will accept this in time, but she seems to think she will lose them forever, its hard for us aswell as we dont live in the same town anymore so we dont get to see eachother as much, i would like to see her everyday but cant because she doesnt want to upset her parents... i really feel sorry for her and the situation she is in, just wish i could think what to do x

[smackie9]

You have some growing up to do. If you can prove to her and them that you will keep working at being a better and more responsible person then you can slowly win their trust. But it takes two to tango, your GF is partly at fault as well. She needs to grow up and take responsiblity for her own problems instead of running to mommy and daddy all the time. I suggest you two go to couples counseling to see if there is a future in this relationship.

[Boisdevie]

Trying to play at happy families to keep the parents happy is just stupid. It's not the right reason for staying together. Resolve the problems or end it.

[lost_lad]

we're not 'PLAYING' happy families, we just don't want to upset her parents as she doesnt want to fall out with them, she told them that we went to a hotel together and they went in abit of a mood with her about it, i just wish there was a way i could show her parents i have changed and i am willing to do anything to provide for their daughter and our child! soo hard when they dont wanna know

[smackie9]

she told them that we went to a hotel together

This right here is part of the problem....if your GF would keep her mouth shut, and keep hers and yours personal issues private you wouldn't be in this position in the first place. Makes me wonder of she gets off on all this drama to get you to do what she wants....some kind of control tactic.