What about his behavior indicates he's trying to control her? My Grandfather was 11 years older than my Grandmother and the idea of him "controlling" her is hilarious. She ran the household with an iron fist and he never had a problem with it once. Meanwhile, I know a man who is only 4 years older than his spouse and he most definitely controls her.
If anything, the OP is attempting to do her fair share of "controlling". He's invited her out several times now and she's found a reason to complain every time. Yet, she texts him once and expects him to jump that very night. Would you do that? After being shut down several times, would you come running when called?