-She says she�s going to Reno for work leaving me at home to house sit for her.
-She goes to Tahoe for the weekend with another man and has sex with him, leaving me worried as her phone is off
-Lies to my face over 50+ times over the course of the next 2.5 months. Breaks up with me over 5 times, verbally abusive every time I bring up her In Reno
-She breaks up with me 2 days before Christmas and ruins the holidays for me. Breaks a commitment with me and my family on Christmas Eve. and has the nerve to ignore me on Christmas eve and christmas.
-Take her away to Half Moon Bay. Pay for everything and fulfill her needs and fantasies. She makes promises, that she would never hurt me, has my back and will do everything she can to make this relationship work. Fills my heart back up and we reconnect.
-New Years Day she comes clean and tells me she cheated on me, never went to Reno, never saw Kate, that it was premeditated, that her phone was working, and also that she had sex with him throughout our three year relationship(beg+end), went to Tahoe with him previously, and many dates
-i am ****ing crushed, devastated and never thought she would chose to hurt me.
-Pulls me back in, with cookies, sex, bathes me, begs for forgiveness, huge amounts of affection, promises and tells me that we are going to take a 30 day break monday and both of us evaluate the relationship after the fact. Tells me how much she loves me, how she never meant to hurt me and that she would never hurt me intentionally. Just as I am starting to trust and forgive her.
I ask her the simple question: "do you now realize the effect emotional walls have on a relationship?"
She blows a rod, gets super defensive and we start arguing. I can't stand it so I leave.
A couple hours pass, and she texts some things, and I basically said, "look give me a break, you just told me you cheated on me, and that you are doing a 90 day no contact break."
I send some texts about her planning something for the weekend for us as she hasnt planned anything in 17 months.
and I am still a little angry about everything and vulnerable.
We go back and forth a little bit nothing extreme.
I ask if she is home, if I could swing by to grab something.
She doesn't respond for a good 2 hours.
I call her no response.
Call again, no response.
She leaves me with "well guess what?"
and she literally disappears.
This brought up old feelings because last time she disappeared she was in tahoe ****ing some guy 2 months ago.
4 hours of no response and 6 texts from me, I send "if you are with another man do not respond."
No response, as I am awake all night literally sick to my stomach, thinking the worse. She knows I hate being ignored.
Text her again at midnight, no response
Dont here from her so I drive by her house. She locked her self in there all blinds shut, with her friend.
ring the door bell once
doesnt answer
so I leave and send a mountain of texts and post a website stating the facts, displacing huge amounts of hurt through words.
im just trying to communicate with her.
she has cut all communication.
she is gone all weekend.
she puts up this massive wall and completely ignores me, and makes me feel like a complete waste of her time.
I feel so worthless and dont understand how you can spend 3+ years with someone and than chose to hurt me.
When I started asking her on friday if she was with this man, she made a conscious decesion to not respond, knowing that it would hurt me...Right?
I know if I loved someone and just hurt them that bad, the last thing I would want them to think is the worse.
finally I hear from her 4 days later after she basically tells me, "ill cut you some slack, I was with friends all weekend. stop making stuff up you crazy." and also she is filing a restraining order which would get me 6 months in jail, as this is now number 3.
i have never been a violent person, or have hit or harmed anyone. I have never raised my voice to her in 3 years.
she goes and stays at friends house, telling all of her friends and family that i am this crazy, violent asshole.
Tonight, I extend a nice email and text, making amends for trying to communicate with her, and saying some mean words.
she completely ignores me.
I ask what papers she filed for the restraining order as it has my family and I worried sick. My 70 year old mom is literally having a breakdown
she ignores me
i feel like a bad person, for how shity she treated me. and to end it like this.
any feedback would help, even if it's positive.
and if i am wrong somehere in this please tell me so that i can be aware and try and better the situation.
thank you world.