How important is it to get a "Good Morning" & "Good Night" text from your SO?

[Wakeup]

And the OP can't?

where do you see that someone said he couldn't?

[searock]

where do you see that someone said he couldn't?

I was just wondering why you bolded the "you": does it mean you think someone on this thread can't? Just curious, I didn't mean to imply anything :-)

[smackie9]

Well yeah... most of ours are like that too. Texted her last night that I wasn't buying steak to grill tonight, because we still have one in the freezer.

ROFL! That's awesome.

[Wakeup]

I was just wondering why you bolded the "you": does it mean you think someone on this thread can't? Just curious, I didn't mean to imply anything :-)

Because it works for Indie. She said "You can get this in text or written word though" and I basically was saying "YOU" can, yes. If she had said "I" can get this from text or written word, then yes, yes she can.

[IndiReloaded]

I should have used the more formal "one" to indicate its a question of personal preference. I chose not too as its generally considered pretentious.

"One can get this in text or written word though"

[Nice Lover Boy]

Personally, I think these kinds of requests are small and keep romance alive in a relationship. Really, you should just tell her it means a lot to you. It's only needy if you whinge about it. Just tell her. If it bothers her, consider that if she can't put the effort in for a short am/pm text, do you think she will put in the effort for other things? Especially when things start to get more routine.

I like your response! I agree, it does keep the little romance alive. She likes romance. And I hate it when lately I do think about her first thing in the morning and I know she woke up first but no text. I'm not insecure, I'm just wondering if I did anything wrong?

She means that it's not nice to just send "good morning" and "goodnight" without at least trying to make the texts a bit more interesting, otherwise it eventually becomes just another boring chore, rather than a sweet gesture.

I always put effort in the night and morning text. For example, "Todays forecast shows partly cloudly but with 99% chance of good morning". When she would reply, all she would say is, "morning". I let this go by for 2 weeks kept doing what I was doing and still same response. So I stop and gave up on the charismatic morning & night text.

Everyone is different my dear, me I wouldn't fret over it. And no it's not the guy's job, nor is it anyone's job. I don't hear from you, I wouldn't take it personally....but that's just me.

I suspect you are dating girls in their early to mid 20's am I right? You will lose this argument every time with them. The majority (not all) of those girls are nothing but drama, and that is just what you have to put up with until they finally grow up.

Yes, she is in her early 20's.

Texting a good night or good morning to me is superficial fluff and doesn't mean much. I had always looked forward to the first call of the day which is much more intimate.

She doesn't like to talk on the phone as she said, so texting is the only communication I have with her.

[Nice Lover Boy]

Maybe I should mention this, but we are not officially bf/gf. When I asked her once, she said she wasn't ready. But I thought things were going great and we both kept the communication going. Since I asked her to be my gf, I stop talking to her since she told me she wasn't ready. Then she came back a week after and looked for me wanting me to continue and try to work it out. So far a month has gone by and we only had slept with eachother once and made out like twice. She is a believer that she is not suppose to sleep with guys until marriage, but we did it anyways. Now things have been falling apart and our communication has declined. I end up hanging out with friends to meet other women to try and move on because all this just makes it seem like after sleeping with me was all that she was looking for. She never initiates convo. We never text about anything anymore, just a few "hows work?" "hows school?". I really like her, we did have good times but everytime I try and bring the good times up, it never goes somewhere.

[smackie9]

Totally dysfunctional relationship....it's just gonna keep going around in circles like this until someone falls off the merry-go-round.....time to jump off, she's not that into you.

[Wakeup]

She doesn't like to talk on the phone as she said, so texting is the only communication I have with her.

Then, yes.. listen to Smackie because this girl is clearly not into you... particularily if she won't even let you phone her. It's usually pretty tough to be able to bond with someone through text only and they won't respond and particularily so when there is no other bonding type contact like one-on-one interaction, video chat or by learning to be comfortable on the phone with one another.

BTW: Did you try to actully ask to see her during the day/evening instead of just texting good morning/night? If you did ask to see her, did she turn you down?

[basilandthyme]

Frankly, if a person was in the habit of sending me good night and good morning texts, I'd probably miss them all. I turn my phone off early and often don't turn it back on till I've been up for an hour or so.

If someone wanted me to send good morning and good night texts, I'd think they were needy and it would turn me off a bit.

[searock]

Then, yes.. listen to Smackie because this girl is clearly not into you... particularily if she won't even let you phone her.

I don't like talking on the phone either, so I'd rather my bf didn't phone me, but I'm definitely into him. But yes, we have (and had, in the beginning) lots of face-to-face bonding time together.

OP, I also think that she really isn't into you. You are putting ALL the effort in this "relationship" and she reacts as if she were annoyed and felt smothered by you. Just let it go, she isn't the one for you.

[Nice Lover Boy]

I do appreciate the responses. If she is not that into me, then how come she ask me when I have a day off from work to hang out? She sometimes invites me over to hang out as well. We'll watch some tv or a movie but we rarely make out. She never attempts to make out with me tho which is very suspicious of what really I am to her.

[smackie9]

Total friends zone............

[Wakeup]

Lets Recap:
She doesn't like unnecessary texting, obviously.
She will not talk to you on the phone but she will let you have one-on-one contact with her. To me that sounds like she is uncomfortable expressing herself with words of any nature when not in person (?) You are failing to bond sexually or romantically with her through those mediums. My advice, stop trying to any sort of meaningful conversations with her through text. It ain't working.


You say she never attempts to make out with you.. well have you attempted to make out with her? If you have, what does she do then?
Have you ever asked her out on a real date rather than just hanging out like platonic pals do?
What are YOU doing to progress this relationship, NLB?

You may have been placed on the friends ladder (google and read Ladder Theory for more on that or read Cerby's sticky thread ont he same subject) but it's unclear since you haven't shared how you attemt to make this a romantic relationship or how she responds when you make those attempts. Note: Good morning and good night texts are'nt working for you, with her.

[Nice Lover Boy]

Lets Recap:
She doesn't like unnecessary texting, obviously.
She will not talk to you on the phone but she will let you have one-on-one contact with her. To me that sounds like she is uncomfortable expressing herself with words of any nature when not in person (?) You are failing to bond sexually or romantically with her through those mediums. My advice, stop trying to any sort of meaningful conversations with her through text. It ain't working.


You say she never attempts to make out with you.. well have you attempted to make out with her? If you have, what does she do then?
Have you ever asked her out on a real date rather than just hanging out like platonic pals do?
What are YOU doing to progress this relationship, NLB?

You may have been placed on the friends ladder (google and read Ladder Theory for more on that or read Cerby's sticky thread ont he same subject) but it's unclear since you haven't shared how you attemt to make this a romantic relationship or how she responds when you make those attempts. Note: Good morning and good night texts are'nt working for you, with her.

Yes, I'm the only reason why we make-out. The first time I attempted, she didn't move her lips or came close to me. I kept trying and after several times we ended up sleeping with each other. After that she said she felt guilty about it because she wanted to save it until after she got married. Anyways, the other times I tried she doesn't get active about it.
Yes, I ask her out on dates but sometimes we both can't do to school and work. But when ever we find the time to go out, I do put my arm around her like we are one. I do like her and lately I have been trying to cut communications with her because I try and flirt with her but she never or even initiates flirting back. I feel like I'm doing all the work.
Also, she sometimes tries and makes me jealous by telling that she is going out for drinks with a male friend while I'm at school. I don't give her a jealous reaction but just wish her well. I don't even make her jealous at all as I think that game is just for high school kids.