How do I get her to Love me again?

[lostinside]

Hi, my name is Nathan. My girlfriend recently broke up with me. We were together for 2.5 years and she broke up with me last week. She told me that she had been having these feelings that she was falling out of love with me. She said she started having these feelings about month ago. She told me she loved me but she did not want a boyfriend at this time in her life. I didn't understand and I tried to convince her that we could work things out, but she refused. I am 17 yrs old and she is 16. This is the first serious relationship for both of us. She told me that she wasn't sure if I was the right person for her and she didn't want to be serious with her. She wants me to be friends with her, but she doesn't think that we will get back together in the future. I love her so much and I don't understand why she is having these feelings. She used to want to be with me all the time and do everything with me, and she was so happy when she was with me. I know she used to love me, but now she says she loves me, but she isn't "IN LOVE" with me. I have read some previous posts on this site and realized that many girlfriends seem to feel this way when the relationships last 2 or 3 years. Some people have siad that the girlfriend will often need to experience being apart from the one she loves to once again realize that she is in love with, and needs that guy in her life. I want her to love me like she used to, but I don't want to push her out of my life if it will destroy our friendship.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

[LightOn]

Yes....and unfortunately it is move on. It is time for you to start healing. It will take a while since your relationship lasted 2.5 years, but the sooner you start dating around and hanging out with other chicks, the sooner you will get over her.

[bohemiandonut]

Wow... so young for such a long relationship, and such a sad break-up!

It's hard to tell what's going through her mind. So, I think you should begin to focus on yourself. You have been with her a loooong time, but you need to realize that you do not need her to be happy.

The best thing for you to do right now is engage in "No Contact" mode. In your case, where it seems like avoiding her completely would make her extremely upset and confused, you can break it to her lightly. Tell her that the best thing for you right now, if you can't be with her, is to take some time to yourself. Do not return her calls. Do not e-mail her. Do not chat online. Do read a lot. Do excercise. Do have fun. Do hang out with supportive friends.

Keeping in contact with her will not solve anything, and it most definitely will not get her back.

If she wants to return, she's going to have to do it on her own accord. The beauty of No Contact is that one of two things will happen:
1. She will realize that she really does want you in her life. Then, the power is back in your hands, because:
2. You will recover, slowly. S-l-o-w-l-y. But eventually you will stop living like a dependent maniac.

Don't count on the former. I'll leave you with a wonderful article that should be of some more eloquent consolation.

[url]http://www.enotalone.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=47594[/url]

Good luck brother; it gets easier. Trust us.
Peace.

[OpticalIllusion]

They've got the right message. Move on. It's good on every level. You win no matter what. Either she'll come running back to you, once she sees that she might lose you forever. Or you will find someone else, and your life will get better. simple eh?

[Picollo]

as you said she love's you but she's not in love with you. her interest level dropped mate and the best thing you can do to suffer less is next her. im too on the verge of taking a difficult decision, but i think its the best for both.

[Illusional]

2.5 years for your relationship?? damn that is long, and you're still in high school? alright you won't like what i have to say because i will tell you to move on. she dumped you for a reason and that reason is to see other people. she fell out of love because she wants to see other people. you two have been together for so long that you only know eachother. she would like to experience more of the world and that means other boys. it sucks but i won't lie to you, it's the reality.

raverboy

[stardust]

Your right, You feel alone but many of us experience it. My ex did the same to me. I wanted him to want me like he used to so much, but after a while I grew tired of it. I still miss him, he was my first proper relationship too. It's time to just get on with your life, and do your best to move on as well as you can. Your not alone!