Please Help Me! i need an advice.....

[DavidC]

Hi, I´m new to the forum and i´m going to try and write as little as i can, feel free to ask anything.

Well, i met this beautiful Brazilian woman about 1 year 10 months ago in Montreal (I´m from Mexico) the first time we only said hi and then we started talking through facebook and skype, it was her that told me she had a thing for me, i was pretty happy so we continued talking until we decided we would meet again in Montreal last summer so we both flew in and well we had very good times but at first i was a jerk i guess i wasn´t really that comfortable around her because it felt very different being face to face, but after a few days it all went better and ended up having the greatest time i´ve ever had.
I think so did she because we kept in touch and she came to Mexico last February, stayed here 6 days and it was even better than before, she is great and really honest she treats me very good and doesn´t want to change me at all and she does like me for who i am, she has no interest apart from me.

So here is the deal:

We are talking about living together and getting serious about us, she is 25 and i´m 21, i seriously find her very attractive, caring and never thought i would find somebody that would love the way she does, she is so honest that she told me that she was going out with her ex but now that the situation is turning this way she has begun to talk about breaking up with him definetly.
And eventhough we talk everyday, she forgave me when i treated her badly (never cheated,was an ass), she saved two times money to meet me making a big trip and sacrifices and now really being serious about us enough to be thinking about breaking up with this guy and now being exclusive, i think its great but im afraid i might be too young for something so serious, i still have some doubts about myself, not her.

What should i do?

[bearz]

she is so honest that she told me that she was going out with her ex but now that the situation is turning this way she has begun to talk about breaking up with him definetly.

This seems a bit confusing to me. First you say he is her ex-boyfriend, then you mention she is going to break up with him. What's the deal with their relationship? How long have they been together and what is still going on between them?

When you two talk about living together, would she move to your area or is she asking you to move to where she lives?

[DavidC]

Well, they went out a couple of years ago, then broke up, and about a year and a half started going out with him again, and she told me that now its nothing too serious and apparently he knows it too.

Well it´s easier for me to go because she is a lawyer and to find a job here would be very difficult, but we have talked about it and she´s willing to move in with me as well

I apologize for my english, it´s been a while since i´ve spoken it.

[bearz]

But she is still going out with him even though you are in the picture. If she is really serious about you she needs to stop seeing him.

Have you visited her in Brazil yet? You should definitely spend some time with her there before you make any other decisions or get too involved with her.

[DavidC]

But she is still going out with him even though you are in the picture. If she is really serious about you she needs to stop seeing him.

Have you visited her in Brazil yet? You should definitely spend some time with her there before you make any other decisions or get too involved with her.

We have discussed that, and the last time she was the one to bring the subject and told me that she was thinking about not seeing him anymore, i haven´t been in Brazil yet, but we´re planning that i vist her and meet her parents before this year ends, i feel confident about her intentions, but i´m not too sure if i´m too young to do something like this especially if she is more mature than me

[Wakeup]

What does your mother think about you moving to another country to be with a woman that has a boyfriend?

it doesn't matter what she 'tells' you. Until she is not longer dating (and having sex) with her boyfriend, you are just the guy on the side.

So! What does your mother think about you moving to be with a cheater?

[DavidC]

What does your mother think about you moving to another country to be with a woman that has a boyfriend?

it doesn't matter what she 'tells' you. Until she is not longer dating (and having sex) with her boyfriend, you are just the guy on the side.

So! What does your mother think about you moving to be with a cheater?

Well my mother passed away a few years back so i don´t know, but i wouldn´t be moving in with a cheater, she told the other guy that she was coming to Mexico to see me and that their thing wasn´t serious, as well as ours until we decide to make a serious move, i´m free to date anyone here but i choose to be with her

[Wakeup]

Okay, so what does your father say about it then? (sorry to hear your mother is not there to give you guidance on this)

As long as she's still doing him, then you'd be a fool to move to be with her.

[ehk55]

ok right thats perfect

[KeyKandiss13]

I say the first instinct is the best one. if your having doubts about yourself I don't think its a good idea to move in with her.