I've been doing a lot of thinking about Emo lately. About the whole punk culture in general, actually, but mostly that annoying little parasite of it known as Emo.
What is Emo? No, it's not a relative of the Emu. If it were, I wouldn't hate it so much. Emo-lovers generally cannot define it. Sometimes I help them out: "Though Emo is generally whiny, narcissistic music for people who hate life, those emotions are part of the human experience, so you could say that Emo is an offshoot of the human experience."
Lately I have not been so generous.
A few weeks ago, a new but close friend and a very smart, good guy was abducted from my school and shipped off by his parents to Colorado. He had already been kicked out of a Christian private school for quoting Nietzsche. His parents are staunch Evangelicals. This came without any warning and I was pretty sad to see my comrade go.
About him: David was into punk music and philosophy. David wore tight, "Emo" style clothing but was kind of thick around the edges. David was the nicest, most polite, incredibly mature kid I have ever met. David was [URL=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bulimia]bulimic[/URL].
I never knew about David's eating disorder when I knew him. The week after he left, I thought his parents had shipped him off for spitting on their faith. I learned through mutual friends about his problem. It hit me hard.
I started thinking about his little quirks: Picking the chicken out of his salads, giving away food, not talking about munchies after getting ripped. Then I started thinking about his friends.
None of David's friends were nearly as smart as he is. That's probably why he started hanging out with me and my small group of friends. They were, however, skinny. And they all wear tight clothes. Tight, Emo clothes. Stupid, tight, mind-****ing Emo clothes.
Then I started thinking about Conor Oberst of Bright Eyes. I started thinking about how skinny he looks on stage and about his latest album. I started thining about the lines "You keep running to the bathroom, say you'll be right back/Well it takes one to know one kid I think you've got it bad." I thought, and I came to a sad realization. You are probably coming to the same one now.
That is why I hate Emo.