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Thread: wtf is her problem, what should i do?

  1. #1
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    wtf is her problem, what should i do?

    This is quite a long story so i'll try to keep it short. There's this girl that I really like, we've been great friends for like 5 months now, we always went to stuff together, got dinner, did homework. On Saturday she asked me to go to this event with her, I was hesitant because I didn't know anyone there, but I said yes. Once we got there I was surrounded by people she knew, but she didn't introduce me to anyone, and basically ditched me. I ended up standing around by myself for several hours. It was a terrible experience, and I was so pissed off afterwards. I really like this girl alot so that was the only reason I put up with this bullshit. I've always been so nice to her, and was always there for her.
    Afterwards, I texted her and I was like what the hell was up with that, i'm always there for you, and that's how you return the favor. She apologized, and said that she still wanted to be friends, and hoped that I would still be her friend. Since I like her so much, I replied saying that I overreacted and that we should just forget about what happened (even though that was completely horseshit, it wasn't an overreaction at all) and that we were such good friends before, that it should stay that way. She replies saying "deal! ". Then shit gets even weirder.
    Today I went to get dinner with a bunch of mutual friends and her, she doesn't even look at me, or acknowledge me. She is basically like ignoring me, and I'm thinking seriously WTF is your problem? I was literally always there for her whenever she needed anything at ALL. She's acting as if it's my fault when LITERALLY IT'S COMPLETELY HER FAULT. I apologized even though I shouldn't have because she ditched me at an event she invited me to. The ****ing most disappointing thing is that before this mess she was the nicest, sweetest girl I have ever met, and to turn around and pull this shit on me when I'm also incredibly nice with her and am always doing stuff with her.
    Now, I have honestly no idea what to do, I would like to just ignore her, but I still have a crush on her after all this shit, and we have so many mutual friends with her that she'll always be around until I graduate college in 3 years from now. I still get the butterflies and get jealous and all that stuff, so obviously just not seeing her would be the best thing, but do to our mutual friends this is not going to happen.

    I always try to be the nice guy, and more and more, I just realize that nice guys finish last.
    Any advice would be much appreciated!

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    Quote Originally Posted by VeryConfuzzled View Post
    Now, I have honestly no idea what to do, I would like to just ignore her, but I still have a crush on her after all this shit, and we have so many mutual friends with her that she'll always be around until I graduate college in 3 years from now. I still get the butterflies and get jealous and all that stuff, so obviously just not seeing her would be the best thing, but do to our mutual friends this is not going to happen.

    I always try to be the nice guy, and more and more, I just realize that nice guys finish last.
    Any advice would be much appreciated!
    If she is ignoring you, why can't you do the same, she'll know exactly how you feel and then ask what is wrong.

    Tell her your busy, when she asks you to do something, make her jealous,
    and try to seek out other girls, see if she is bothered by it.

    If it doesn't bother her, then she clearly just wants to be friends, regardless of how much you try.

    You've had 5 months to make a move, and you did nothing, so i think your to blame with some of this.

    You were playing it safe, way too long, girls don't want someone like that,
    they want someone that takes charge, and sees that your there for her.

    The first settle hint that you had, of feelings for her, you should have tried something, she might
    be getting too comfortable with you now and doesn't see that relationship type vibe between you two.

    Seems like she wants her space, because your getting too close, when she suggested that your just a friend to her.
    Last edited by Kromat83; 07-05-13 at 08:36 AM.

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    She was never that into you...and now she feels awkward. If I invited a guy I was into to an event I would make sure he was by my side the whole time....not run off with my friends and ditch him. You may like her, but she doesn't share the same feelings.

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    Should I try to talk to her about it, or actually say how I feel? The only reason I even reacted like I did was because I like her, I normally keep feelings to myself, even under tough circumstances. If nothing more I would still like to remain friends.

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    Quote Originally Posted by VeryConfuzzled View Post
    Should I try to talk to her about it, or actually say how I feel? The only reason I even reacted like I did was because I like her, I normally keep feelings to myself, even under tough circumstances. If nothing more I would still like to remain friends.
    I think she's made it clear you guys are friends. But you will never know the answer to your questions if you never ask her.

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    Quote Originally Posted by rayna View Post
    I think she's made it clear you guys are friends. But you will never know the answer to your questions if you never ask her.
    I just talked to her like 30 minutes ago, she's just not the same anymore, I don't know how things went down hill so fast, was I wrong to point out the fact that she ditched me? When I talk to her it feels like i'm just talking to a cold shadow of a person, before when we talked she would be so vibrant and I would really enjoy having conversations with her. She said she was just having a bad day but I don't believe it for a second.
    This is embarrassing, but I cried for the first time in years after I got back to my dorm. I was so head over heels for her, and we were so tight, and now she doesn't even seem to want to be friends anymore.
    I've got a ton of really tough exams coming up next week and I can't concentrate studying for them because this whole situation is all I can think about. I honestly don't feel like living anymore, this stuff just always happens

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    g tell her how you feel then ffs
    dont mention being suicidle
    get it out in the open
    get closure
    stop being a bitch

    with all due respect of course

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    Don't understand how things escalated so quickly, or why I have to be the one trying to win her back when she is the one at fault, I guess there's somethings about girls i'll never understand.

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    tell her how she has made you feel
    tell her your feelings man
    the biggest sisue here is you are doing your own head in
    seriously
    you need to get this out in the open before it cause more pain that it is worth.

    she is just a girl at the end of the day
    there are sooooo many more

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    Quote Originally Posted by BennyJamesField View Post
    tell her how she has made you feel
    tell her your feelings man
    the biggest sisue here is you are doing your own head in
    seriously
    you need to get this out in the open before it cause more pain that it is worth.

    she is just a girl at the end of the day
    there are sooooo many more
    You're so right only it's really complicated right now, because I don't even know if she wants to be friends anymore, she says she does but her tone and body language says otherwise. I need to stop being a bitch though, these thoughts are really killing me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by VeryConfuzzled View Post
    Don't understand how things escalated so quickly, or why I have to be the one trying to win her back when she is the one at fault, I guess there's somethings about girls i'll never understand.
    Mate, you are fast-tracking yourself into being a doormat.

    If a person who has good self esteem and boundaries is treated badly, they dump the person who did wrong and don't look back. But you're writing this off to her being "a girl". If you're successful in winning her back, you'll be in for more of the same.

    Ditch the bitch
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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    You have been spending time with her for five months? Why didnt you ask her out on a date 5 months ago? You put yourself in the friendzone!!

    You should forget her and move on

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    You are delusional. The nicest sweetest girl you ever met. HA!

    Reading this was kinda funny. She probably got sick of you drooling over her.

  14. #14
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    Shit's messing with my head, thanks for the advice and talking some sense into me. She'd be lucky to have a guy like me and she's missing out, not going to hang my head about this anymore.

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