Taking back a liar....

[b_hernandez]

Hey guys, I'm new. The main reason why I got on here was to find some sort of an answer or something to make sense of this situation...so here we go.

The past week....my guy was acting really weird......and I could tell he was lying but I didn't have proof....so I made the mistake (or was it a mistake?) of logging onto his Twitter, and I confronted him about talking to this girl through direct messaging. I specifically asked him about two hours before if they'd been talking and his reply was no. So I asked him again, about six times, and he still said no. So I took a screenshot of their conversation, sent it to him, and replied "Well, this says other wise."

He was taken aback because he didn't see it coming. Then he told me about how he messaged this other girl who he grinded on at a dance when I wasn't there. He KNOWS that I really don't like her in the first place too...

The next day, his sister told me about his flirting with some girl he worked with at the pool. So I asked the girl about it. She said yes it was true, and she said my boyfriend told her he liked her. I was livid. I called him over to my house and confronted him in person. Nothing. Didn't say a word. I'm just so upset....I mean, why would you tell a girl you like her, and have no intention of getting anything out of it. Does that really happen???????

So a few days later, he's cried, REAL TEARS, after I've yelled at him about it and balled my eyes out in front of him. I will always compare myself to her, at least that is what it feels like. I jut don't understand why he would say he liked her if he didn't have other intentions of saying it. I am just really torn up about it. I have always been faithful to him even if I've seen a guy I'd be willing to get to know better. We've been together for three freaking years. Is this too much to get mad over and throw away three years worth? I'm super upset and I still love him, as stupid as it is to do that. Writing this, I'm thinking "Ummmm duh! Find someone else because no one deserves that." But I can't really do it. Can I just get a guys perspective on why he would do that, do you think he really is sorry if he cried (I always read things that if a guy cries over you then it means something, but i don't know if that's true or not), and he has said over and over he doesn't deserve me and if I need my space he will let me go. but I keep holding on! What's your advice on what I should do or what do you think is understandable or if I'm being really stupid and I should just dump him......
Please help me out fellas. Thanks in advance guys!

[michelle23]

if i were you it would be over. hes a cheat and a liar. get rid of him!


as to why he did it ? does i even matter? theres no excuse for it

and his crocodile tears are bulls**t. dont fall for it

sorry im not a guy but id never ever forgive a cheat no magter how much i loved him. and it dont matter if he didnt actually cheat. he wanted to, he was planning to and would have

[basilandthyme]

I feel like there's a whole lot of history which you haven't told us. It's just that how this whole issue started doesn't make sense.

You say that you knew he was lying about something, but how did the situation arise where felt he had to lie to you? It sounds like you must have been confronting him over something. Why did you have him on the spot in the first place?

[surfhb2]

Yeah.....There's definitely another side to this drama story LOL

[b_hernandez]

Well we were really happy and all of a sudden he stops. Yeah I can be kind of bitchy sometimes, and yeah I can sometimes overlook things he does for me. But it goes both ways. But anyways, I thought we were super happy with each other. But then I asked about a girl if he'd been talking to her, and he said no. But he said it really...weird, like it was unlike how he talked. I was suspicious and I was a snoopy bitch and I got on his twitter. that is how this all started, then the rest kind of unfolded by him telling me about the girl on Facebook and by his sister telling me about this other girl he had told he liked her.

and Surfhb2.....it's easy for you to laugh at but I don't think you understand how bad it hurts right now, for the both of us ha. so thanks for your two cents

[surfhb2]

Well we were really happy and all of a sudden he stops. Yeah I can be kind of bitchy sometimes, and yeah I can sometimes overlook things he does for me. But it goes both ways. But anyways, I thought we were super happy with each other. But then I asked about a girl if he'd been talking to her, and he said no. But he said it really...weird, like it was unlike how he talked. I was suspicious and I was a snoopy bitch and I got on his twitter. that is how this all started, then the rest kind of unfolded by him telling me about the girl on Facebook and by his sister telling me about this other girl he had told he liked her.

and Surfhb2.....it's easy for you to laugh at but I don't think you understand how bad it hurts right now, for the both of us ha. so thanks for your two cents

Yeah.....Im only a middle aged divorced father .... I know a little about pain in relationships

He talked to another girl? Thats it?! I mean....whats the real issue? He should not have lied but he obviously was freaked because youd fly off the handle. Personally, you both sound really young. How old are you?

Maybe hes sick of your bitchiness and the fact your dont appreciate what he does for you ( your words, not mine)

[michelle23]

hes been chatting up other girls. Its black and white. Its not your fault. Hes a douche. Just dump him and be done with it

[Jaque]

I'm not a guy, but I can definately tell you that those tears are often crocodile tears. I never believe them for a second.

He's saying he doesn't deserve you, and that he should give you space. Take him at his word and find someone who DOES deserve you.

I'm kind of worried about some messaging stuff right now myself, and it's nowhere near what you described.

You sound very reasonable and like you were very patient. You've done your due diligence.

That's not being stupid, that's just being optimistic that someone will return to you what you have given them. Doesn't always happen, sadly, but now you'll know more clearly what your boundaries are on things like this. WIN!!