How to make her feel something for me?

[Sloof]

Hello everyone,

I'm a 17 year old guy and my crush is 16.
I know her from the local scouting group.

I had an eye on her for about a month and my friends pushed me in to asking her out, so the next time after scouting I did. And she said yes!
We would meet at the train station and go to the cinema together, we are both kinda shy so the initial meeting was really awkward.
Nonetheless we had a really good time (of course I paid for pretty much everything except the train costs) and on the way back I got myself to put an arm around her, that's when I made the crucial mistake of trying to kiss her and she refused friendly. (I did apologise for this)
So instead of going for the kiss I gave her a little kiss on the cheek and I think I saw her smile a little.
While riding our bikes home she invited me for a drink at her place, of course I would go!
I met her father and made a good impression according to her, and three days later I asked if she wanted to go out with me again. And she said yes again.

In the meantime we had multiple conversations over Whatsapp that would go on for more than an hour. And I couldn't stop thinking about her.
So two weeks later I went to pick her up and we went to the beach together, I had a wonderful day but it felt as if it was more as friends because of little things like: we would sit next to each other, but with a considerable amount of distance in between us. And I thought to myself that asking her to be my girlfriend now would be a bad idea because we obviously need more time.

So after that we rode our bikes to the ice cream shop and I bought a cone for her and myself. We ate it at the nearby park on a bench together.
She thanked me for the ice cream and we would go to her place to play on the Wii or whatever.
On the way back I explained to her that I had a really shit last two weeks (school and work related) and that I was very happy that she would go out with me again.
That's when she suddenly stopped and the conversation went into all serious mode.
''You are a really nice guy, really. But I just don't feel anything for you. Let's just be friends''

Heartbroken I went home and cried for a considerable time (and the last time I really cried was 8 years ago because my grandpa died, I don't cry that fast)
It is summer brake so there was literally no one I could talk to so instead of dealing with it, I made the stupid decision to contact her over whatsapp saying how sorry I was for all the things I didn't do and didn't say, making desperate moves I shouldn't have. All the piled up emotions from the last two weeks just exploded let's say.
She being so sweet sat through all of that and saying how it wasn't my fault. She felt really bad for me.

The next day I went to apologise for my outbreak via whatsapp, and thank her for sitting through all that, and she said that she totally understood me.
Her dad said to her that what wasn't there yet, perhaps will come later.
That and she just had a terrible break up for the stupidest reason ever that she had not totally come over yet.
So we made up and decided that we could try to get to know each other better. As friends.

She is coming over next Thursday and I really don't know what to do... Obviously I really do love her. I gave her compliments on how she looked and numerous times on how sweet she is.
I understand that possibly she will never feel anything for me, but I want to do everything in my power to make it happen!
I don't know what else I can do besides just being nice and myself... I made her laugh multiple times so humour is present.
Seeing as she is so sweet and she really digs cutesy stuff I prepared some cute games we can play (on PC).

Thanks for sitting through that enormous wall of text and I look forward to reading your replies!

[miki036]

well, then again..
she is going through a rough time too..
All I can think of a solution is that, you become her good friend and be always there for her..
until she opens up about her love life..
trust me communication is the key.. when she discloses that info..
just listen and be there for her..
do not make any moves until you see her ready for another relationship..
so that's it I guess

[Sloof]

Thanks for your reply!
It helps hearing that from you, a couple of friends said the same actually.
I will do that, thanks again!

[dem862]

You can't make somebody feel something. They either do or they don't. All you can do is be yourself. That's what you are best at, and nobody else is exactly like you. You may not be her type, and you may never be her type. But sometimes girls give a guy false hope because they don't want to hurt him. They don't realize they are doing it, and they don't do it on purpose. If you want her as a friend, you now have an open invitation. But it may be very hard for you to watch her date other guys, have crushes, fall in love, etc. So you may want to cut your losses and keep looking for a girl who is interested in you. Good luck to you.

[Sloof]

You can't make somebody feel something. They either do or they don't. All you can do is be yourself. That's what you are best at, and nobody else is exactly like you. You may not be her type, and you may never be her type. But sometimes girls give a guy false hope because they don't want to hurt him. They don't realize they are doing it, and they don't do it on purpose. If you want her as a friend, you now have an open invitation. But it may be very hard for you to watch her date other guys, have crushes, fall in love, etc. So you may want to cut your losses and keep looking for a girl who is interested in you. Good luck to you.

I actually talked with her about this, and it is very clear that she is not doing this just because she feels sorry for me.
And she also said that it's not because I am not her type (she is not sure she even has a ''type'') or my looks or how I act.
We are doing this just to see if anything will change at all, and if not we at least tried.

Also ''Making her feel something for me'' sounds a bit... much... I just wanted to know what I could do to maybe make her seem interested.
I understand after talking with several people that I shouldn't do anything like that.

Thanks for your reply though!

[pacachomp]

Look, it seems as if she is interested and that you're doing pretty much everything you can, she's just confused because of her last break up.

Keep being there for her, try and be slightly flirty to avoid the friendzone, and there's a good chance that with time she'll come around.

[Sloof]

So she came over today, it was slightly awkward, but we watched a funny movie and played some games. In the end it seemed like we both had a pretty good time.
Problem is... I really can't stop thinking about her... And that's pretty bad considering we are now supposed to get to know each other ''as friends''.
Also I really don't know how I can be there for her. I mean, I want to be there for her. But if she doesn't share that kind of information with me or nothing bad happens,
I can't do anything, can I?

[madelinel]

Number one rule: Don't show her that you desperately want her to be your girlfriend.. Just play it cool.. try to be friends first and see how things go.. don't try to force things to happen.. girls usually like bad guys( you know what i mean).. so don't act as the sweetest or nicest guy in the world.. it will only put you in the friendzone..

[JustKat]

I just wanna tell you that her feelings is totally out of your control. Hm, it's like she's trying to play hard to get. So, why don't you just agree with her and start being friends? Have your eyes on the other girls. I'm sure she's not the only one that can make your heart pound really fast, so yeah. Goodluck