Can you be Exclusive without being Romantic? Very confused!

[helloyellow]

I have a question a good one I think - Can you be exclusive without being romantic?

About a month ago, I met someone online through a dating website and we hit it off but a week later he told me that he was talking to other girls still and wanted to keep his options open. I left and told him to get lost. He had deactivated his profile and made me think I was the only one. A few weeks later he comes back asking for another chance and to be friends. Explaining to me that he wants to marry his best friend and he's never been friends first with a girl and he thinks he should do everything completely different because he's tired of getting burned by women. We've been seeing each other for over a month now. I live 1 hour away and he is always driving to my side of town to see me. It's been the way since the beginning.So we became friends but friends that go on dates. He will kiss me goodnight (nothing passionate), he will hold my hand, and do little things to let me know he is attracted but sometimes it bugs me! I want to speed up the process and he doesn't. I haven't been over to his house. He says I will have to wait since I told him the guy I dated in-between him was too physical and invited me over to his place too fast.

Last week he got PISSED that he found me on the dating website we met off of and that my profile was active. I didn't understand why because I really thought he didn't like me that much and we "weren't exclusive". We got into a fight pretty much through text and he said we needed to cool it. So I gave him his space. I deleted my profile and took it down. By the end of the week he says he wants to see me. So we see each other and he tells me "like a test" (I'm assuming it was a test) that I can still keep my profile up because he says I like the attention from the men... and I tell him no I took it down because it was the right thing to do and we're only see each other right? And he tells me I'm right and has the biggest grin on his face. So I guess that means we're exclusive? He really never opens up about this feelings ever. I wish he did so things would be a little bit more clear but maybe he's just scared?

He also told me that we doesn't want to be boyfriend & girlfriend until I move out of my parents. Yeah it sucks that I live with my parents but I was sick and almost died last year so I am rebuilding my life. I just feel he doesn't get sometimes.

So yes my question is can you really be exclusive and not romantic? Is that even fair? Can you be friends (kiss mildly & hold hands - go on dates) and be exclusive?

Let me know what you truly think about this situation. I need some perspective before I get in too deep or if this has similarly happened to anyone else and what was the outcome?

Thanks so much!

[michelle23]

I would tell him to go f**k himself and not to contact me again. It shouldnt be this complicated. Theres plenty of guys out there who know exactly what they want and would be happy to be your man so stop wasting time on losers and go find one

your being a twat

[pcmaster]

Looks like you can. It looks like you want more from relationship that it is right now. Like candles, roses, jewelery, words, like I like you, I love you, You are most beautiful girl on this planet.

Yet guy tells you that he dont even want you to be his GF yet. Lame excuse for a guy. Hes acting gay and you should ask him wether hes gay. Hes obiously not sure about what he wants cause being jealous and at the same time saying he dont wana be GF and BF makes no logic. Hes infecting you with his insecurity and you should definetly take over the lead and say what you want from him instead of waiting him to do something. Dont stay in this BS any longer. Set the relationship frame by treating him like a friend or like a boyfriend. If hes not ready to be a boyfriend then just be friends and dont let him touch you. Dont play stupid games where you dont even know where you are.