Attracting "specific" type of women

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Hey there,

This question has actually bugged me for a long time now & only after another fail with a "specific" woman, I actually made the effort to search up a relevant forum and post my thoughts, so bear with me, if you can.

First of all I have to say that I'm a big thinker and I like to think outside the box and I tend to over-analyze things with regards to life in general, and relationships come hand in hand with it, obviously. Judging from my history of dating I realized that most of my relationships were blonde women and not any other hair color. I know it might sound a bit silly to distinct women based on hair color, but I'm coming from my analysis. Each day, I'm beginning to think that my eventual wife will be blonde and not a brunette, although I prefer brunettes much more. However, the problem is that I seem to attract blondes much more than brunettes for some odd reason. I know a couple of women even now that are interested in me, who are blondes. Yesterday I failed another time with another women, who is a brunette.

Of course you might think that hey, this guy is talking nonsense, but it is true, I guess I over-analyze a lot. I have had only one relationship with a brunette and it was a total disaster in the end. I didn't manage to "hunt down" another brunette ever since. I have had some attempts such as going on dates, spending time with each other, even kissing, never sex, but it all boiled down to one thing - you're a great guy, but I don't want anything more.

This is interesting, because I use my strategy with blondes the same way and it tends to work much better. My last relationship was with a blonde for almost a year. When I'm getting to know a person, or spending time with someone, I'm always going for relaxed atmosphere, telling jokes all the time, being funny, I even make fun of myself at a times, so most of the time let's say my main specialization is humor and lots of crazy ideas, like let's go here or there. I never want to get stereotypical.

Now you might want to ask - so where is the problem in this? Just go for the blondes and have fun & good life.

There is one major problem with regards to this. I find brunettes much more attractive in the sense of beauty - This is not to offend any blonde women of course. Everyone is special and beautiful in his/her own way, but this is the way how I work. They are basically the types that I would imagine my life with. However, I recently realized that I'm much more sexually attracted to blondes. It's basically like this. I imagined myself being on a desert Island and if a beautiful brunette was to appear, I'd want to cuddle with her, look at the stars, walk alongside the beach and have a great romantic night. However, if a blonde woman was to appear, I'd forget all those things - of course I'd do all those things that I would do with a brunette, BUT with a simple end goal - sex in the end. And that is not exactly how I want my relationship to look like. I only realized now that my recent relationship was basically like this. However, do not say that I did those things just in order to have sex - That is a big No No. I genuinely enjoyed taking my ex gf to movies, doing surprise dinners etc, but I was so sexually attracted to her that in the end I wanted that "one thing". It's not my fault that my organism behaves in such a way, I'm just stating the facts here. And yes, I'm the type of man that distinguishes women to 2 categories - women to date and women for sexual intercourse. If you don't agree with this distinction, then I respect your opinion, but you should respect mine as well.

So basically now, I'm caught up in this limbo and unsure what to do. And yes, I know that in the end hair color doesn't matter and you should pick your eventual girlfriend based on her character, outlook and other things, but at the end of the day I'm saying this, because this is my personal experience. Whenever I see a beautiful brunette my heart immediately melts down and I think that is a great girl and every time I see a blonde I think of not really nice things. Sadly this is the way it is.

I know that hair color doesn't say much about the type of character and that hair color can be changed, so, so far my entire argument is just bunch of nonsense, but to here I'm just counting the blondes that I find attractive and brunettes that I find attractive. That is just a segment from the "total" blonde & brunette population. I really see specific distinctions between these two groups. I'm not saying this is true on the global scale, but it is true to a high extent in my personal experience.

Now I'm thinking about 2 possible things.

1) Go with the flow of nature and accept that I simply attract these type of girls and try to be happy with them and hopefully in the end of time I will find a great girl for myself. (I didn't make this analysis only on this one relationship btw - there were more). But with this solution it would always bug me that I find brunettes much more attractive it would be a regret for me. This is not good as I generally try to "Live without regrets" and this rule would

And with blondes I found that there are 2 types of blondes - materialists and housewives. I'm not really that much interested in either. I would want an all round fun element girl.

Again I'm saying that you might disagree with all the distinctions that I make here and call me an idiot and that I'm totally wrong, but these ideas come from my observations and my own past experience. If something, I will give you benefit of the doubt, but I see things this way.

You might say that there are so many women out there (blondes) and you're putting them into two baskets, you're an idiot. You just just had an experience with only a very small fraction of women. Yet again I say, these seem to be the women that I attract and I do not just analyze it from my own experience, but I tend to look around me and see for example my friends dating, people on the street. I'm a fan of body language and generally the traits and I try to figure a person based on these personality traits. So yes. Another option goes...

2) Go against this and hope that at the end of some day some brunette will say more than "I don't want anything more". With this I'm thinking there are 2 possible suggestions.

a) Find the right brunette girl - which I obviously have not found yet.
b) change the way I do things and generally myself

But I find the option b) to be nonsense, because I like the way I do things and I'm not really willing to change.I believe that people can never truly change. Regardless of what they will do, their core will stay the same, their core values, however, they can change their character to some extent, but given enough pressure and other things, that can return back to being "normal". Although I'm not saying I do things in a good way, and yes, I do a lot of stupid sh*t which sometimes doesn't make sense, I'm not really a fan of going against the flow of nature. Sometimes I believe this is the way you're supposed to be and that you would act naturally so don't change it, because that is who you are in the end. Also, always to be yourself, because only when you're yourself you're attracting the right type of girl. But this basically brings me back to square 1 and at the very bottom of my own Limbo.

That being said I'm done with my ranting and & now I wonder whether anyone has had similar experience in the past?

Thanks,

Best Regards,

D.

[searock]

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